Thursday, September 10, 2009

Open Letters....

I've decided to sum up my recent adventures in the form of Open Letters to those that annoyed me:

Dear Ghetto Kennywood Mom:
Matching your underwear to your outfit is cute- except when EVERYONE can see your BLUE polka dot underwear thru your WHITE shorts. ( I tried really really hard to get a pic.) Also, the $30 you spent buying food at McDonald's for your 3 kids (to eat cold later and fight with you about it), you could have spent on HOT food at Kennywood. They probably would have fought with you less.

Dear Ghetto Kennywood Mom #2:
Just cause my 2yr old kid doesn't stand quietly in a long ass line like your 8 yr old does, it doesn't give you the right to give me a dirty look when I send a text message. She isn't hurting anyone so, like I said: SHUT UP. Again.

Dear Kennywood Patron #1753 & #1754
When we ALL stand in the food line for 25 f&%$ing minutes and you STILL cant decide between the 5 choices, get the HELL out of my way. Or I will stab you with my fork. 2 year olds don't have patience for 35 yr old idiots who want meal 1 with side from meal 3 and a the gravy from meal 4. This isnt f&%$ing Burger King, pick something and MOVE IT.

Dear Random Drivers:
USE YOUR TURN SIGNALS! They are on EVERY CAR. I am sick of dodging assholes who cut me off, turn unexpectedly at me or in front of me, or drive like grandma on Sunday in her Blue Boat Cadillac. This pisses me off so badly I was ready to start sporking people the other day. Stop driving like ASSHOLES!! I don't give a shit what state your from or what they do there. srsly. IN PA YOU FAIL your driver's test if you DON'T use the damn things. 10 years later the rules HAVE NOT CHANGED.

Dear Rude Ghetto Pedestrian:
I know in PA you have the right of way. MOST of the time. However stepping out in a busy street- NOT in a crosswalk-and SLOWLY meandering your way across the road will you pretend ALL cars are invisible is F&%$ING RUDE and STUPID. Someday, I hope a car runs your ignorant ass over when you do that. 4 times this has happened to me recently. I hate all 4 of you.


Angie (aka that ranting bitch) :-)


  1. Wow. Wow. Wow. Where do I begin?

    Re: Kennywood Mom No. 1
    --> Wow, that's awesome. I saw some pretty awesome Kennywood moms when I went, too. I think these people watch "Kennywood Memories" and "Adventureland" before going to the park and think the styles in those flicks are current.

    Re: Kennywood Mom No. 2
    --> I admit, I hate when kids are yelling and screaming in line. Anywhere. Though, I have a short fuse for kids. But, I don't give the parents a dirty look, I usually stare at the kids! I know, I'm evil. I only stare at the parents when they don't correct their kids.

    Re: Kennywood Guests 1753 & 1754
    --> OMG! I know! I love the ones at the POTATO PATCH! You either get cheese fries or cheese fries w/ bacon. And they stand there like, "derrrrrrrrrr, what do yinz wanna git?" Oh I hate it!!!

    Re: Random Drivers
    --> YES! YES! YES! I about got out of my car Wednesday b/c some moron didn't use a turn signal...not once. not twice. not three times. BUT FOUR TIMES!!!!! Finally, when he turned into a Burger King, I honked and passed him. Slowed down enough to yell, "USE A TURN SIGNAL, JAGOFF!" He flicked me off. Oh I wanted to spit in his Whopper.

    Re: Ghetto Pedestrians
    --> Yeah, I hate people who meander across the street when they're NOT in a crosswalk. Jagoffs!!!

  2. Re KW MOM 2: All julia was doing was grabbing the railing and lifting her feet off the ground and swinging back and forth. She couldn't get hurt if she let go anf she wasnt swinging enough to be hitting people. Or even hurting them if she did bump in to someone one. I apologized if she did and for the most part she was very good at kennywood.

  3. Shoulda bitch slapped that mom! :)

  4. Heh. Last night I was driving my grandmother back to my house and some kid decided to meander across the street as I was making a left. I said, "It says don't walk...I can help you with that."

  5. Re: Turn signals...
    I live in Maryland, which appears to be a turn signal-optional state. And when they DO use it, it's usually about 10 feet from the intersection while I could have been on my way 15 seconds ago but didn't want to look like an A-hole by pulling right out in front of them. I hate them all.

    RE: meandering jaywalkers...
    Baltimore is full of them. It's like they're just daring your to do something while they ease across the street taking more time than inchworm crossing a pond of molasses.

    It's times like that I wish I had a hood-mounted water cannon.

  6. I love the water cannon idea. LOVE.