Sunday, December 5, 2010

Pittsburgh is still traumatized...

So a funny thing happened the other day.
It got gawd damn COLD.
In 24 hrs it went from 50 to 30. I know!! I was in shock. My freaking car has been groaning for the last 3 days because it was in shock too...

EVERYONE who lived even remotely NEAR Pittsburgh in February 2010 knows about SNOMFG aka Snomageddon... I wont say another word. Doesn't need introductions. Ever.

On my way home from Cranberry the other day... I discovered just HOW badly Pittsburgh was still messed up from... well, you know. Snow flakes started blowing lightly (not landing or sticking) in the air and the next thing you know, EVERYONE is doing 45. On 79 south.
Nobody EVER does 45 on that stretch. But damn, I could practically hear all the screaming going on  in the traffic around me from the mere SIGHT of snow flakes.
*sigh* Its gonna be a long winter.

Saturday, November 27, 2010

Black Friday Idiots

I never ever shop on Black Friday. There is always a riot at a walmart over electronics. The traffic is insane.. At $3.09 a gallon my ass is sitting in the chair, shopping at Amazon. Srsly.
Finally... The people are NUTS.
Per the PG:
Shoppers head to the stores early
The first shopper at the North Hills Village Mall Best Buy appeared at noon Thursday for the can-you-believe-it deals that have become as expected this time of year as turkey. At least 300 people had joined nearly four hours later.
Nearby, a crowd of at least 600 people stood outside the North Hills Village Target.
REALLY??? WTF is wrong with people. Don't you spend 1 damn day with your family?? Huh? 1!!
Shoppers pitched tents to brave the rain or stood near store-supplied propane heaters to stay warm in the early hours this morning
You know what I call that? Fuckin.... Nuts.
Its cold. Raining. IT'S THANKSGIVING. Stay Home.
And in the "I can't make this shit up!" Column:
Before I go ANY farther.... WHY THE HELL IS THIS NEWS?????
Are you EFFING kidding me? My brain actually hurts from reading JUST the headline. SRSLY.
Whats next? 
"Pirates Players discover other teams win with low payroll and drink themselves in to comas"?
"OchoCinco realizes he will never see a Superbowl ring and end-zone dances himself in to traffic"?
"Anger over repeated threats for bus service cuts sparks Riders to beat management senseless"
 Oh wait... that last one could happen.... Heh.

I can't even quote the article. The whole story is completely absurd. It makes me so mad I want to spork the AP for even publishing this story ANYWHERE.

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Happy Ranting

I will bitch about our football team #fail later. For now?
A Happy Post

So first up? I am checking some *more* shit off the list.... I know!!! I need a New List. Funny thing... I was saying I needed to add something to it and now I forget what it was. Shit....
Original List:
  • Go to the Ocean. 
  • Go to see Falling Water
  • Go to a Penguins Game at the CEC (I will sell my kid for a ticket.... just kidding. maybe.)
  • Go to a Haunted House and actually get scared, Scare House maybe? I am so freaking jaded that the last haunted house I went too my heart didn't even race a little bit.
  • Go to Karaoke and actually sing. Nothing scares me more than singing in front of people. I am working on planning a Twitter Karaoke night. Soon.
  • Go to Kennywood for phantom fright nights with out a kid in tow so I can ride the coasters in the dark and really get a rush.
See all that Purple??? See that the Pens Game is IN PURPLE??!!
That is thanks to @douglasderda. I will have a ticket. For a pens game. ON MY BIRTHDAY.
I am stoked.
BTW Karaoke was a roaring success. In the house for my first song at Dukes (in bethel) were @feuxdeforet, @jackieinserra, and new friend @chicklitlisa. And?
From what I understand very few try and succeed well at Evanescence. Well, Jackie and I nailed that shit twice and I'm pretty sure we were encouraged to come back by some of the regulars. (It was loud so I couldn't hear the whole conversation). We danced, we sang. It was fun as hell girls night out. The place is nice, smoke free, has an excellent DJ and sound system. (New fav drink? Cherry vodka and Sprite)
Now that I have overcome the fear... I am pretty sure we will have to do this on a regular basis. So anyone who missed out.... There will be future outings. I promise.
Gawd I love singing.
I will get a new list posted soon....

Sunday, November 7, 2010

A Bunch of Random...

So first up... The List

I am pretty sure with the exception of Twitter (and Friends) Karaoke... nothing else is getting checked off before next year..... So, Haunted House? Done. Karaoke? NEXT WEEKEND!!! WOOO. Anyway.
How can you go insane in under 20 minutes? {mom blogging}

Julia: What is this street's name?
Me: Pioneer.
Julia: Why is that its name?
Me: Cause it is.
Julia: Why?
Me: *brain explodes*

Julia: Why is there 2 green lights?
Me: Seriously? I don't know
Julia: Cause they put them up there.
Me: *brain explodes*

Julia: Where is Greentree Road mommy?
Me: What?
Julia Greentree road.
Me: Its the other direction.
Julia: Are we gonna go on it?
Me: No. We are going this way to grandmas
Julia: Why?
Me: Because This way is faster.
Julia: Why?
Me: *brain explodes*

Julia: Look mommy that police car matches our car
Me: [believe me] I know
Julia: Why is it a different color?
Me: Because police cars are different since they are the police [cut me some slack, my brain was hurting at this point]
Julia: Why does it have those lights in the window? Why we don't have those lights? Where are our lights? You NEED those lights mommy. Mommy how are you gonna get those more lights? Mommy one of the police lights is broke [burned out break light]. Where are all the other cars? Where did they go? Are they hiding from us?.....

Kid 1 - Mom 0 {/end mom blogging}
Dear Steelers and Penguins

Srsly?? Seriously? You all need to get your acts together. NOW. There is only ONE loser sports team in the city and that is the Pirates. Do me a favor.... KNOCK IT OFF.
love, me

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Strange (and scary) Sightings.... Random Edition

Resurrecting the Strange Sighting tag on the blog tonight... woo!!! lol 
I have a few things to show you tonight.... The first up::

Hideous Dress Courtesy Of Scarehouse Scott (pictured with said dress) He is the Creative Director of Scarehouse... and I would love to know where he found this....

Scott and the freaky bunny next to him enjoyed tormenting Burghbaby with that dress Ryan Secrest Style. Even though she eventually put it on. (Your welcome for me not posting the pic with you **in** the dress standing next to him. I have a few of those.... but they are too scary to post here lol...)

The dress?? **shudder**

From reader Beth:
I don't want to ask. I really can't imagine how desperate you are to work to BE IN this musical. Do you think the company who made this sign for the bus giggled the whole time??? Do you think the drivers were all: "I'm not driving the Menopause bus!! You drive it." Is there a union rule that says you don't have to drive the Menopause bus if you worked at PAT for at least 10 years???

Also from Beth:

As you see.... Proof that sometimes... the smart kids have WAY WAY too much time on their hands.... And no girlfriend....

And Finally.. All I'm gonna say is that they were doing their hairz out there the other night with hair dryers and curling irons.

Yes. Its a floor lamp. Yes, there are car cleaning products on the porch wall.... Yes, they started painting and then stopped. No. I am definitely  NOT gonna ask.

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

What I learned at Scary Crazy....

I learned that some people will do ANYTHING for a good cause. Like running (yes running.) through a haunted house that terrifies her. Or putting on the most hideous dress and make-up I have ever seen in my life. They both looked like they wanted to puke and/or cry. But they sucked it up for KIDS.

Scary Crazy raised $6,299 to split between the 2 charities (see prev post)


Here is a taste. Trust me. Listening to this through Ginny's wireless mic in the VIP/RIP room? Hilarious! (For the record. Ginny went in it *a second time* w friends which I didn't know until later)

And From Unclecrappy... Our point of view....

Now that your done laughing.... What I learned....

I learned that I am not a screamer. ScareHouse made me jump out of my skin a several times. But I never screamed. Apparently, I have to be truly terrified to scream. Haunts just dont because I am too f*&%ing "its not real" about the whole thing. Only giant roller coasters  scare me enough to scream. Case closed. I lived vicariously through Ginny's screams.... Thanks hon. :-)

Also I learned that I am still the biggest klutz. EVER. Ginny might have lost a shoe... I freaking FELL on an uneven spot when I got too close to a rail near the end.  I felt it, but I was reacting to someone yelling at me and had no chance to save myself from ending up on my hands and knees.  And I missed doing a header into the opposing rail by hairs.

I was the head of the the group of 6. So 4 Scarehouse Actors, 2 ladies I didn't know, 1 reporter w camera man, and 1 twitter friend saw me bite it GOOD. My knee is killing me. I took 2 layers of skin off in one spot.

Now that your done laughing.... I would go again. It was pretty cool. I'll watch out for the rail next time... or maybe just not wear heels to disguise how freaking short I am.

Saturday, October 2, 2010

Checking shit off the list....

So. First I want to mention that like 12 people Googled how to get rid of stink bugs... or stink bugs in general and then clicked on my previous post : Things that piss me off: Bug Edition

I wonder if they were inspired, amused or horrified by my murderous spree. One which continued with 4 more deaths and 4 that committed suicide when they found out I was coming for their little bug asses the other day.....

Second I want to mention that Strange Sightings tag may get revived. Cause I have seen some strange shit recently. Its amusing. I promise.


Tuesday I get to check off Scarehouse off my list... Now the issue here is I am so jaded that this stuff doesn't normally scare me. It may or may not. I am kinda hoping it does. Srsly.
I have a ticket ordered from Michelle/Burghbaby that votes for Jane Pitt/ThatsChurch to go thru there by herself... I'm sorry Ginny, but if it doesn't scare me, I would like to live vicariously thru you... LOL.

The biggest thing I LOVE about all my twitter friends is their generosity. Both these ladies are raising money for sick and needy kids. Read the posts I linked to. Tell me you have done something this wonderful recently.... SRSLY. They are not the only ones. Just two examples of good people doing good things for kids stuck in a hospital, or ones whose family doesn't have enough money for Christmas presents. Twitter Friends Rule.

I'll be there Saturday, I hope I get to scream from Haunted House for once. And that Ginny does too....



Friday, September 24, 2010

Thing that piss me off: Bug Edition

Let the word out.
If you are a bug, your ass is dead if you come near me. Especially if your a f&%$ing stink bug.
I am the bug assassin. If your a bug? "I keel you!!" (jeff dunham ref)

I have been ignoring the little bastards for like a week. I hate them. They are the creepiest f&%$ing bug I have ever seen. Last year I was stalked by one in my house. There was about 3 hanging out in my room at moms... We kept our distance. But they freak me out.
Well I noticed 4 in the bedroom at my house.
I noticed them because when I sent julia in there on a time out from teasing the dog, she laid in the bed, crying that were "scary bugs everywhere." I made her serve her time out on the chair in the living room. I never got to deal with them because the flash storm rolled in and knocked out power to half of the south hills area for like 12 hours.

Today, when I walked into that bedroom to close the open window because the air was on, I was STUNNED. I counted 13.
Oh. Hell. No.

This shit was ON now! I whipped out the vacuum, put the attachments on the hose and let out a battle cry. Well... I cursed at them a lot. As I sucked them up, I started enjoying the satisfying little "thwak" they made. Hehehe DIE bitches DIE.....

Anyway. That open window had a gap in the screen. When I pulled the mini blind up there was a f&%$ing parade of the effers heading to that gap in the screen. I think I muttered the words "I dont think so assholes." as I wacked the screen. And there was WAY more than 13 in the Bissel at this point. I stopped counting at 25 dead. I sucked every single one up. Behind the dresser (its in front of the window), the walls, the window sill... Then I covered the end of the hose to be sure they were all suffering a horrible suffocating death for terrorizing my kid. ( and me at night when I'm trying to sleep) I closed the window real tight and stalked the last couple that escaped the bedroom. I ran the sweeper on the carpet to add to their misery if any were still living.

I went to moms, and repeated the same process in my room... Discovering there was like 8 or so more. I am pretty sure by then I was shouting shit like "I am the assassin!" "F&%$ you bug." "DIE" "You can run but I will get you!!!" "Who is the bad ass bitch with the bissel??!!" "Let me hear your little screams!!"
I ran the sweeper on the carpet on 2 floors to ensure their miserable deaths. And I flushed one tonight that had snuck in to my bathroom to hide. I enjoyed the drowning. Bastards.

I killed almost 40 of those f&%$ers today. The catch? I have the same model bag-less bissel at both houses. And the containers will need emptied at some point....

Friday, September 17, 2010

Things I would like to do

I am not calling this a bucket list... too f&%$ing cliche.... Its just a list of things I would like to do in the next 12 months.

  • Go to the Ocean. 
  • Go to see Falling Water
  • Go to a Penguins Game at the CEC (I will sell my kid for a ticket.... just kidding. maybe.)
  • Go to a Haunted House and actually get scared, Scare House maybe? I am so freaking jaded that the last haunted house I went too my heart didn't even race a little bit.
  • Go to Karaoke and actually sing. Nothing scares me more than singing in front of people. I am working on planning a Twitter Karaoke night. Soon.
  • Go to Kennywood for phantom fright nights with out a kid in tow so I can ride the coasters in the dark and really get a rush.
Okay... I think that is a start. Some of these would work better to have someone (or a group) to do it with. But if I go it alone... then so be it.

Thursday, September 16, 2010

Getting my Inner Bitch on

I am still on vacation... but there are a few things I would like to get off my chest.

First, the foremost thing on my mind... When the HELL is the West End Circle makeover gonna be done?? For the love of GAWD. Put the switch plates, cabinet handles and socket covers ON and call the Realtor!! (house flipper reference) Jez. And what ever they did with that damn light coming from the Main St. Ramp? It is TOO LONG now. Fix it.

I took Julia to Erie at the beginning of my vacation to play in splash lagoon and then a beach on Presque Isle the next day. Two things stand out that annoyed me.

First: Signs. I don't know if it is an Erie thing or what, but all the damn signs were small or 27 feet from the road!! While Google Navigation is yelling at me to make a U turn, I can't see the hotel sign in the dark, pouring rain cause its HIDDEN behind the Shell Station at the curb. And the hotel is set WAY back off the road. This happened with Splash Lagoon too. I passed it, looking for a sign along the ROAD, not right up against the building.
It's not like that here. Signs are along the damn road.
For about 30 minutes at the beach I thought Erie would be a nice place to live. Then I remembered how f&%$ing cold it gets and how much snow they get and I changed my mind.

Shit... all that bitching and I forget what number 2 is.... must have been the snow. Snow definitely pisses me off. Well I reserve the right to revisit this should I ever remember what was.

Some Other things that piss me off

My car hates Sams Club gas, I swear I put the good stuff in right before I left to come home an I have some horrific gas mileage ratio for this current tank.

Local Radio: OMG PLEASE there are LOTS of other songs NOT by Katy {fake} Perry, Keeeesha {the skank} or John {the whiner} Mayer. Please play some of those songs. My non hate of radio lasted all of 3 months. I am sick of it. Also DVE can take some pointers from Erie's version of them (102.3 I think) and note how they play all kinds of classic and new rock with out sucking or killing me with the same Ozzy song billed as "new" for 8 months.

Those creepy "stink bugs" that are f&%$in invading my room. Whats the best way to get rid of them?? Please??

Now Things I Heart:
I heart Google Navigation. I would have never done that trip on my own w a kid without some GPS in the house. Especially in the dark. Pouring rain. In a city that hides signs. There was no epic fails, minor ones, but no epic ones because of my awesome droid inc.

Pandora Radio cause I can refuse to hear any of the previously mentioned crap above that I am sick to death of hearing.

And Finally,
I heart all my twitter (and some real life) friends. For totally being here for me and sticking with me through the ups and downs the last few months. I mean that. Without you guys and gals.... I can never say thank you enough.

Thursday, August 26, 2010

Stupid Hall Of Fame: Wedding Edition

Welcome to the Wedding edition of Stupid Hall Of Fame. Courtesy of USA Today's Offbeat section. (msnbc moved all their shit around and now I can't find their weird news.)

All Aboard the WTF Train:::

Sometimes, if you have friends like these... you don't need enemies...

Wash. bride arrested for DUI on her wedding day 
BELLEVUE, Wash. (AP) — A 31-year-old bride heading home from her bachelorette party was arrested for drunken driving hours before she was to get married.

Washington State Patrol Trooper Christina Martin says the woman was driving over 90 mph Saturday morning and weaving in and out of traffic on Interstate 405 in Bellevue when she was stopped.
Ok... So... WHO are the BAD bridesmaids that let the bride DRIVE DRUNK from her bachelorette party. Lucky for her ass... she made it to the wedding... Srsly though? That is an #EPICFAIL of her bridal party...

Who was like "Eff her, she can find her own damn way home." How do you *not* have a designated driver for the damn bride? The NIGHT BEFORE the wedding? People still do that the night before? Who the HELL wants a hangover, little sleep and then get married the NEXT MORNING? I guess its the same Idiots who let the bride leave her own party PLASTERED.

Continuing with the wedding theme on the WTF train... Watch my head explode with confusion and amazement:

Pa. man gets drug case hearing, then wedding.
EASTON, Pa. (AP) — The bride wore a gray suit. The groom wore a prison jumpsuit — and handcuffs.

And a Pennsylvania judge was doing double-duty after having just handled proceedings in the groom's drug case.

Northampton County prison inmate Franklin Barndt and Takesha Piazza were married Friday after he tried to have evidence against him dismissed in a cocaine case. Defense attorney Gary Asteak said he hatched the idea after seeing Piazza in the courtroom.

Judge Leonard Zito said he had never gotten such a request before, but "we're a full-service court." And when Zito asked whether anyone knew any reason why the marriage shouldn't proceed, the three-year mandatory minimum sentence that Barndt faces if convicted didn't come up.
The pair even managed to exchange a kiss over the objections of prosecutor Michele Kluk.
I can't even BEGIN to make shit up this good. Bet the wedding photos RAWK. I would LOVE LOVE LOVE to hear the story about how mommy got married to daddy and then 3 years later they actually got to see each other with out bars, plate glass and prison guards. What kind of anniversary presents will they exchange?
Money in his commissary account?
Home made his and her shanks??
Candle light dinners chaperoned by the Parole Officer?

Final stop on the WTF train is Tokyo. There is a 2 min video with this one if you follow the link...

I-Fairy robot weds Tokyo couple in tinny voice
The nuptials at this ceremony were led by "I-Fairy," a 4-foot tall seated robot with flashing eyes and plastic pigtails. Sunday's wedding was the first time a marriage had been led by a robot, according to manufacturer Kokoro Co.
Really... I'm tired of the whole "Lets {insert ridiculous idea here} for our wedding. It's {yawn} and over used. Its fine to be unique. Its another thing to have a $70,000 robot that requires a person to punch in the commands to marry you.
....Wires led out from beneath it to a black curtain a few feet away, where a man crouched and clicked commands into a computer.
 "It would be nice if the robot was a bit more clever, but she is very good at expressing herself," said new husband Tomohiro Shibata, 42, a professor of robotics at the Nara Institute of Science and Technology in central Japan.
The I-Fairy sells for about 6.3 million yen ($68,000) and three are in use in Singapore, the U.S. and Japan, according to company spokeswoman Kayako Kido. It has 18 degrees of motion in its arms, and mainly repeats preprogrammed movements and sounds.
HEY!! If you want clever? GET A HUMAN TO MARRY YOU. Come on! This stupid thing doesn't even stand on its own!! I can put a wreath of flowers on one of those damn idogs. It barks,  runs around,  fuckin rolls over... Its a lot cheaper and funnier to see a robot dog go nuts "marrying" a couple...

My brain hurts.

Sunday, August 22, 2010

7 things....

So first... Oops. I didn't realize it had been like 10 days since my last post.... Sorry about that. Life has been a bit busy.

I owe a reader a PAT rant... but that's not what this post will be about today. Soon. I promise. One of my favorite blogs inspired me the other day.... Now I am following thru with the comment I left saying I would blog my answer...

The other day BurghBaby wrote This Post: Celebrating Our Talents that was inspired by a blog she saw.

I have thought long an hard about 7 things I feel I excel at. And it is very true.... Somewhere along the way we stop being proud of our talents. Here are 7 things I am proud of about me.

#1. I am Self Taught. For years, I have built (rebuilt) my own PC's from scratch .  Starting w a memory upgrade to my first Packard bell when i was a freshman in college. No Formal Schooling. Everything I know about building pc's, I have taught myself. I asked a ton a of questions, did tons of research, made mistakes... (last upgrade my mistakes were admittedly cause it had been 5 yrs since the last build). I may not have always done it the "right way" but "Angie's Way" has never failed me yet. I know one reader who did have schooling for it that nearly died when he found out how I greased a processor.

#2. I am a good mother. Julia is behaved for a 3 1/2 YR old. She says please, thank you, kisses my boo-boo's when I have them... ( I'm good a being a klutz too) She is an outgoing, smart and sassy little girl. I would like to think that is because how much I love her. Sometimes she is still the mistress of destruction, but hell... what girl isn't every once in a while?

#3. I am an excellent singer. While I never got to do much w my voice after high school... I have never stopped singing. My range is not as big as it used to be, but its decent. (Ask the person who drove me home from HelloSAL and had to listen to me sing Fiona Apple's Criminal as loud as I drunkenly could) I was in a special program for 2 years in high school that required an audition to get in to. I sang at a wedding when I was in college too.

#4. I am Creative. I have written a full novel. I like to believe it is a good book. Some people who have read it gave me great feedback. I have half of one done that I might one day get time to finished. I but I wrote the whole story from scratch. Edited it 10,000 times. I am proud of that book. One day I will get it published.

#5. I am great friend and listener. I am not always ranting. I am there for my friends. Listening, giving advice when I can. Consoling or supportive when I cant. I try to always be there for my friends. I do my very best to be the kind of friend I want to have.

#6. I can RANT. Just ask the twitter friends of mine who met up with me at @pghrugbyangel's birthday party... Me ranting in writing is apparently just a taste of entertainment compared to me ranting out loud when I am pissed. That is probably because you get the inflection, and the written word has more thought than words just coming out of my mouth when I am venting...

#7. I can arrange me some furniture. It was a skill I acquired in high school when I needed to be in control of something. I laid the smack down on my bedroom more than a few times. No matter the size... i find a way to move it. Myself. Till this day, put me in a room and I will find a way to arrange it. Multiple ways. Usually in the middle of the night...

Now, there is my 7. Can you name 7 for yourself??

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Cause its been a while... WTF?

And the headline in the PG:

Woman wipes dirty diaper on car during traffic dispute

CONNELLSVILLE -- State police say a woman wiped a dirty diaper on the window of another woman's vehicle during a dispute in a traffic jam as both were leaving the Fayette County Fair.
I cant make shit up this good.
Is this like the new road rage??? You kill them with baby poop instead of bullets? Personally, I think baby poop should be considered a damn bio hazard/torture device/weapon of mass destruction. I have a 3 year old, I **know**. The day I didn't have to change a poop diaper/pull up was the happiest fuckin day of my LIFE.

So when they arrested her, and yes they did... exactly what charge do they use??? Personally, she should be charged with domestic terrorism for THAT...

Oh and this headline? I want to smack someone for. I disagree,

'Dora the Explorer' turns 10 ('diez') as model for pre-K girls

Dora the Explorer marks her 10th anniversary Sunday, but parents, teachers and pediatricians are the ones celebrating.
At a time when children's entertainment is dominated by princesses and fashion dolls, educators say Dora— which remains the top-rated preschool program on TV — has provided a rare, positive female role model for girls.

Ok. So I will tell you WHY I hate Dora. 
Someone gave Julia some Dora books. In one of them Dora is getting a MAIL TRUCK unstuck from the mud by putting stones under the tires and PUSHING IT. YES... a toddler push a f&%$ing mail truck!!! So guess who wants to push cars now? My kid, cause Dora does. I "lost" that book. {stab}

Don't get me started on the Wiggles. 

My final thought of the random evening:

This just in:: Ke$ha posed for a photo shoot in a garbage bag. And thought it was awesome... Proof that the bitch is white trash. I hate that the record industry gives untalented, computer enhanced people deals to make fake music that sucks so bad live that you wish you could spork yourself in the ears to stop the pain. BTW Mick Jagger is NOT hawt at the ripe age of 75 billion years old, Keeeesha. Get off the crack pipe and the Jack Daniels and you might SEE that. Stupid Bitch.

Saturday, August 7, 2010

A Day with out Epic Fail

[mom blog post w mini rant]
On Thursday, we made plans to go to North Park Pool... With friends of course. Funnel cakes were rumored to be found there so yeah... We were going. We were DARING the weather to not get nice by going... Damn it got really nice...  Julia LOVES water.... I went with @pghrugbyangel,  also @burghseyewife, @shellrenee and their boys, along with @aphotobug‘s son. The kids and the adult pools are enormous. I was stunned.

First I must say that I Giant-Red-Heart the Android OS and Google Navigation for getting my ass to North Park in the first place. (aka F you iphone)
I was supposed to follow my friends out there but my drive way was blocked:

And these men were making my head explode when they did this to my sidewalk:

Because they are preparing to tear down the house across the street.
Assholes better fix that shit right!


I get to NP and the place is damn empty. So its easy to find my friends. Julia plays in the kids pool for a bit but refuses to get in the big pool. "Jen says this is MY pool." She says referring to @burghseyewife's comment that Julia had the kids pool all to herself.
                    ---------> empty ass pool!
When @pghrugbyangel asks her, Julia goes right with her. To the Big Pool! Next thing I know Julia is diving off the ledge at her. It was adorable. When we tried to get her to go down the slide... There were about 14 thousand trips up and down those steps to the water slide. She would watch everyone else go. Chickening out every. single. time. I promised to catch her. Jen said she would catch her. Finally, I told her she was going or not at all. She looked at me and said "I want my new friend, Claire to catch me." 
The boys (what great kids they are) raced down the slide to go find her for me and tell her. 

Here is where I know my kid. She will love the slide if I can just get her ON it. When her new friend was waiting at the bottom, I pried Julia's hands off the railings and ignored her totally when she said she didn't want to go. And I MADE her. She LOVED it. As soon as her friend caught her, She said "I want to do it again!"

It was 3 more times she went down. The last time she came off the slide sideways (lol) and was done. She then proceeded to play in the kids pool, eat and try to drown her new friend later... LOL. After the others left, we finally made our way out via ice cream bribe. She did ask... when could she play with her new friends again....

Then, I got lost leaving, Google got me to RT 8, But seriously, Someone should tell Google that RT 28 should never be an option for travel unless the world is ending. Period. Even that wasn't that bad. We even made it to the Family Fest at Brookline park. Julia made crafts, jumped in the the blow up things they had and had loads of fun.

After lots of Epic Fail for me lately... There was no epic fail Thursday. It was wonderful.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

BP is STILL pissing me off

While being consumed Sunday by the sickness from hell that caught me by surprise.... I discovered new ways to hate BP. I laid in bed for many hours Saturday night into Sunday evening. With just the radio on. In my brief moments of clarity... I heard commercials.

The first one was a man talking candidly about owning BP stations and how he employs people in the community and thanking people for still using his stations despite BP being the biggest jagoff on the planet at the moment. Well, that last part? It was implied. ;-)

An I thought, "Oh, that's nice. A local business reaching out..."

Then later on, I swear to God, I heard an almost identical ad, this time from a woman. Saying almost the exact. same. thing. [stab]  My deduction is that BP sponsored these ads and they are completely "actor portrayed" or the owners were handed scripts and money and told to read as though their franchise license depended on it.

The final straw was an ad I heard this morning for Sanibel Island in Florida. After droning on about how terrible the spill is and how it is a travesty to tourism, They proceed to practically shout that there is no oil spill in Sanibel!!!!

It seemed to me like they were rubbing it in that their beaches were "pristine" (their words, not mine) and that it was the only place in Florida you could go now. Kinda like "Its terrible! (Ha-ha! Suckers! We are cashing in on this bitch) Oh, its so awful!!!" Totally insincere sounding. I wanted to punch the radio. Except it wasn't the radios fault such nonsense was coming out.

So I turned it off. And found a new level of disdain BP and all their "Safety Rules? What Safety rules? Its SO much cheaper to cut corners." Bull Shit. Assholes.

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Sunshine Personified

Tonight's 2am post is not a rant.... It about Secret Agent L
She also writes {with love from Pittsburgh}

I got to meet her and even got to snag a hug from her, like twice on Saturday night at her reveal party. It was awesome. Sorry, no pics posted here. I hate what I look like in pics. Esp after stuffing myself with good food and pms blah before going over to the Firehouse lounge.

I think I have a girl crush on Laura...

She is a constant ray of sunshine in my twitter feed, and is as beautiful on the outside as she is on the inside. I am glad to have met her. I am glad that she reached out to me when I was having self esteem crisis. I was astounded to see how happy she was to see me at her reveal when we had only been twitter friends a couple weeks.

I was also reminded that even in heels, I am barely 5 foot 4... and she is like 6 foot tall. I was worried that she might fall down when she was hugging me.

I had so much fun, seeing my friends, putting faces to those not met before, meeting new ones...

I am glad I went. She makes me want to be better at something in life. That's what I'm gonna try to do.

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

I have a headache....

I could rant about many things.... the parking bullshit, the bus bullshit that makes the parking shit worse, the bullshit of my wireless mouse not working.

I dont think it matters what I say.

Maybe it is the full moon making me so *off* right now. Maybe it is the lack of something I need. Maybe its just wanting to be heard, just wanting to say things that matter to someone.

I didnt start this blog because I wanted to be famous, or popular. I have no ads, no major clubs/networks on here, Its just me.

I just wanted to feel connected to something, To not be so disconnected from life so damn much. The last few months have been pretty shitty... with some highlights... As I try to find the path, or make my own. I just wonder if there is light at the end of the road. If I will ever find what I seek.

Yet here I am. Still slightly off. Out of sync with the world. Realizing at some point in this road, I started to really care if people read this... I know now I probably have less than 100 readers.

I have been blogging for almost 2 years. August 7 will be my 2 yr anniversary for this site. I will keep blogging. Even if only 3 people read it. It's really for me. 

I can't wait for my vacation in september. I wish I could afford a hotel for a week and take julia and just get away from *all* of life for a week. But, I'm not rich. So, maybe we will just go north for that week. I can sorta hide there. Right?

Monday, July 26, 2010

A Minor Rant

This about my car. I love my car, 2004 impala. Its fun to drive, responds well, handles well and has my favoritest feature ever invented, auto headlights... Even the turn signal lights are easy to change. I thank twitter for suggesting youtube to watch a video of how easy it was because they were probably sick of me complaining about the crazy blinking signal light on the dash every time i tried to make a left turn. That car makes sure you KNOW one of the lights is out....

I digress... It has one minor thing that annoys me, but is expensive to fix. Cars have these things called body control modules. They are parts on the computer that work things like power locks, cruise and other electrical stuff.
About 5 minutes after the main warranty was up the module that unlocks the doors started to act up. To replace the module it is like $300... I loathe to spend... maybe next year.
For the record, Chevy put only 1 key hole on the driver's side. Something that I did not pay attention to until the doors wouldn't unlock. When it gets hot, the car wont unlock with the buttons or when you put it in park. Period. Sometimes turning the AC on and splitting it between the dash and the floor gets it working again. Typically... you have to freeze yourself out though. With our latest heat streak the damn locks haven't worked in like a week. Even after sitting over night.
Its really annoying when you have a kid. I had to teach Julia how to unlock her door last year cause there is no key hole for her damn door. I am not rubber band girl with the ability to stretch from the drivers seat to the passenger rear seat to unlock it myself. Rolling the back window down is not always convenient either,

Well, magically Saturday, on my way to HelloSAL in that blazing heat, the shit started working. Apparently, if kept hot long enough, that bitch of a module will give up and say "damn is it HAWT in the 'burgh... I might as well work" and the locks have been working correctly ever since...

Maybe the car is worried I will search youtube for body control module replacement and try to do that myself too. Hmmm.... 

Wonder how long till it annoys the shit out of me again....

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Your F&%$ing Kidding me, Right??

This is the headline.
(bp and their bullshit inspires uncensored F bombs)

Feds say Gulf seepage not from BP cap 'Not unlike an oil leak you might have in your car,' Allen says

SRSLY?? What the HELL!? How much oil is freaking leaking??? Don't you normally FIX your car's oil leak? Gawd I wish my car ran on something other than oil and gas right now. Apparently oil just leaks all over the damn ocean and nobody gives a shit.
There are two wells within two miles of BP's blowout off the Louisiana coast in the Gulf of Mexico. One has been abandoned and another is not in production. Around 27,000 abandoned wells in the Gulf aren't checked for leaks, an Associated Press investigation showed this month.
Here is the best Dumbass quote so far:
"Everything's looking good," Wells [BP VP] said. "The relief well is exactly where we want it. It's pointed in the right direction, and so we're feeling good about that."
Really?? Aren't you assholes the one drilling the damn thing?? Did you close your eyes and slam it in the ocean floor and fucking HOPE it was POINTED IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION???  Do you NOT know exactly WHERE the broken fuckin well is? I mean COME ON already.
At a hearing in suburban New Orleans, one of the ill-fated rig's drilling supervisors told Coast Guard investigators that the rig's crew didn't stop drilling or properly notify regulators when a hydraulic leak was discovered in a critical safety device weeks before the blast. Well site leader Ronald Sepulvado testified that he and others aboard the rig believed the leak wouldn't prevent the device, called a blowout preventer, from functioning properly.
I hate BP, and Transocean. I can't believe they thought it was CHEAPER to ignore safeguards and rules. Was it really cheaper BP?? Was it all really worth it now?

You morons.

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

The Saturn From Hell (aka Epic Fail 4th of July)

The weekend started with my mom leaving her car at my house for me to use this weekend while she was away. (thats another story) When she dropped it off at my house, I was at work already. She informed me via text that the car had been "fixed" by the "mechanics" at Schuler's. I wasnt aware of anything be wrong with it... I had it just a few weeks ago and it was fine...

For the record... My moms car is a plastic toy Saturn Ion. (I drive an Impala. Every thing smaller feels like a toy.) When you press the gas, I SWEAR TO GOD her toy car says, "What? Are you talking to me? You want me to go? .... Oh OK." The instrument panel is in the center of the dash, which is the DUMBEST place ever. (Yes, I am looking at you too Mini Cooper) Anyway...

So, thru text messages, I find out the later that the car doesn't want to start and I might not want it. In hindsight... I shouldn't have taken it. Turned out the "mechanics" who "fixed" my moms car FORGOT TO PUT ALL THE PIECES BACK ON THE F&%$ing car. Srsly. I cant make this shit up. Some cover for some wires is missing under the hood. Supposedly it needed a fuel filter, and some miniture wildlife was supposedly storing miniature nuts in the miniature engine compartment. Right.... Schuler's = rip off.

The decision was made I would check it out before work Saturday morning. When I got to my house, I went down back and it took a couple tries, but the Toy started. I ran it to burger king on Brownsville road and back and it was fine. I decided it was ok and off to work I went with that thing. I was such a dumbass.
I beat the tiny gerbils to 65mpg to get a good run and get the cleaner thru the engine that had been poured in the gas tank the night before. It seemed fine. At lunch, I ran to target for shirts without holes and to giant eagle to get REAL cold medicine.  Each time, I coaxed the Toy back to life after 1 or 2 tries. Saturday night I was still way out of it with the cold, and instead of driving to Moraine at 1130 at night on dark back roads and risking it, I went back to moms. It took 4 tries to start the car. Going home seemed to be the best choice.

The original plan involved me spending the day at our camp in moraine w Julia and taking her swimming, relaxing and then heading back to Pittsburgh about 7 and watching the City fireworks.

Here is what really happened.

When I went to moms Saturday night, I had to unload the car since I decided not to go up till morning. I parked in on the street. Took the spare key out of the ignition and tossed it in my purse. Dug for house keys. Popped the trunk. As I was getting out, I shoved phones and keys in my pockets. I realized I had no real way to lock the car (no remote). So, I hit the lock button on the door. And got out. AND SHUT THE DOOR!! Locking myself out of the car. With my purse and work bag right on the seat.

Thank goodness my clothes bag was in the trunk. I invented new curse words for my mistake. I looked all over moms house for an extra key. I text her about my huge error. She was sleeping by then. Terrified someone would break into her car to steal my purse, I hardly slept all night, listening. In the morning, I finally got her on the phone. Spare key still nowhere to be found. I call my sister.

I LOVE MY SISTER. At 11am she was driving me to Moraine to get mom's keys. We get there, I get the key and decide it makes more sense to just bring Julia home because otherwise I would spend most of the day on the road. (remember that). Pack sister's car with kid and her stuff... head back to Pittsburgh. We get to moms, unload. Its now 230ish.

New plan is to take Julia to Moore Park Pool. Pool closes at 5:45.Then watch fireworks at Mt. Washington.

We change to our swimsuits. I realize Julia's suitcase is in Sister's car still. We head over there on our way to the pool. When I was given keys, it was never mentioned that sometimes mom has a problem with her key. (It has a chip in it and I have decided that chips in keys? SUCK.) At first the key wont go in, then it does and the car starts right up. I think, "SCORE!" Half way up Berry Street the car says. "Fuck you!" and stalls. I frantically start it, stop at Sister's, leave the car running and snatch the suitcase. Off to the pool. Its 3:30.

I get to the pool, park the car. Put it in park. The locks don't release. The key wont turn off. I must have looked insane yanking with all my might to turn the car off. In and out of park, neutral. Nothing worked. It would not shut off. Srsly. I called my mom, half out of my mind with frustration. Freaking out, I drive the car to my house, bust down the door w julia in tow.


We put it down back. Neighbors come over and I'm on the phone with mom (both of us freaking out), Julia is crying cause I promised her the pool. Finally, they pull a fuse and the engine dies. All the lights do not. That requires a battery pull for god's sake. You know where the damn battery is in that fuckin car?? THE TRUNK. Its now 415pm. Julia settles for her little pool. Eventually.
The key I used all weekend is needed cause the window was down and the trunk is closed. Now I have to go back to moms a house AGAIN. So, here I am in my car. Driving back to moms. Get the spare I was using. Pack all our stuff up, change out of my swimsuit cause its 440pm. I spend 10 minutes reflecting on how much of a fail this day has become.

Its 5pm when I get back. Day ruined. Baloney sandwiches and pasta salad is dinner. I put Thumblina on for Julia and try to rest for a bit now that I have spent ALL DAMN DAY in a car. I give up all other plans. We end up going to watch Dormont fireworks with neighbors and playing with sparklers. That part wasn't so bad. But I have never been so happy to see a day end.

The key is still stuck in the Toy. In the "on" position. It refuses to believe its in Park. We moved it so that the "mechanics" can come tow it Tuesday. The fuse still had to be pulled AGAIN cause the car did not shut off when the battery was disconnected. Srsly.

Friday, July 2, 2010

When Videos say it all for me...

I have 2 for you today... 

Not that I am advertising sprint... but rather android os... still this video is funny as shit. When the character starts saying why she wants and iPhone 4, I wanted to yell sarcastically "cause it has FOLDERS!!! oohhh"

I dont normally watch Rachel Maddow, mostly cause I forget... but I like her rants about those assholes at BP. They Suck. This link is from a reader...


To understand now, requires one to understand then. Evaluating 33 years of life is not easy. But that's what I have been doing.

My school years were spent almost a full year and a half younger than my classmates. This led to a lot of problems for a lot of years for me.

I learned at a young age that I feel things very deeply. I learned to protect my heart after it was hurt many many times.

I learned to be more mature than my age in effort to try and fit where I didn't. I never fit. Then I decided I didn't want to fit. Fuck everyone. I was different and I knew it. I had teenage rebellion... But it was a different kind. I rebelled against other teenagers. I didn't drink, smoke, sneak out of the house. I did stuff.... Just my way. On my terms.

But with my heart, I made the same mistakes again. It got me hurt again, in a different way. I shut down again.

After being held up at gun point twice in less than a year at 2 different jobs. I really shut down. Dropped out of college.Concentrated on working. Now when I look back, I see I stopped living life.
It was quiet and lonely for many years. Friends came and went. Soon I just gave up. Nobody got ME.

Something happened the year I turned 30. I also got pregnant. Something changed inside me. Maybe it was the hormones. The post baby depression that nearly consumed me after wards... But there was a change. I longed for understanding and passion and to LIVE. I thought, no, I know I found it. Suddenly I WANTED it. Needed it. I stopped living the "safe" path and discovered rebellion again. I rebelled against this notion that life is over once you have kids. I rebelled over this role I was expected to assume. "Work, Take care of child, house, Sleep & repeat" That post baby depression made me weak. It took long lonely months to come back from it. I didn't have the strength I did in high school to do what I needed to do. So I suffered.

There were times the suffering wasn't all consuming. Those times helped me grow again. A little at a time. My moments of light. That, none of it, was about rebellion. Then I lost my job last year. It was devastating. And then the pressure was unbearable. I got a new job. The pressure didn't let up. I couldn't function. So, I gave it 8 months.

And here I am. Fumbling around. Taking risks left and right like its nothing. One risk involved my heart again. So far... the jury is still out. But I am currently hurt.

I punished myself over and over for an extended period. (still do sometimes.) For what I viewed as my failures and flaws. My self esteem goes from good to dust. I feel invincible one day and ready to crumble the next. Personally, I should get a medal in personal torment. I am epically good at it. I am sure I know where the future could take me. But I am taking the biggest risk ever to find out. I'm hurt, but somehow I am still flinging myself forward into the unknown. I am scared. But I am not stopping. I am not giving up. I could end up alone. But I have reached a cross roads in life where I can walk either alone or be unhappy. I think I am OK with walking alone.

Because I get to be me. I hope that then... happiness will find me. Again.

I have to now balance life, work, being a good mother and finding happiness. I hurt people and pushed people away when I hated too. I hurt myself (metaphorically speaking) but its better to have tried, than to watch chance pass you by. I have let way too many of them do that already. I make sacrifices to cause as little disruption to my child as possible.

Instead of shutting down, I am trying to be more careful with my heart. I had to quiet it again. put away feelings so deep and rooted... I have to believe there is true love out there for everyone. That when it happens, its easy, it works. Just.. IS. I have seen it. It does exists.

I have to believe that even though I am different, there is someone out there different enough to love all of me.

We will see how this goes.

Saturday, June 26, 2010

Hello!!?? We only have 1 earth people!!

As the bullshit with BP continues... now the story includes clean crews... some who don't appear to give a shit about the meaning of the word CLEAN.

Its a damned travesty. I really hope the people at BP and Transocean see how much cost SAVINGS they have a achieved by cutting corners. In fact I think they should go LIVE in the most affected areas.

(from MSNBC You all know as Ol' standby)
Dirty disposal of oil cleanup material Review finds shoddy work by handlers of boom, other waste

A mound of oily sand sits in an uncovered waste container in a parking lot at the crown jewel of Alabama's park system, Gulf State Park. Water from the previous night's storm drips out of the bin into a brown pool on the asphalt.
A waste collection area dotted with numerous bins full of spill debris stands in what seems like an odd spot: Smack in the middle of the tourist section in Gulf Shores, Ala., directly across the street from a seafood restaurant hungry for customers because of a lack of tourists.
Yet Jerry Kidd, doing maintenance work at a condominium, couldn't believe it when he saw a Waste Management Inc. truck pull away from a collection site in Orange Beach piled with loose sand, oil-smeared protective gear and oily boom pulled out of the water. It was trailing pollution of its own. "They're going down the road leading to the landfill; they take the same route every day. They're leaking onto the roads, into the storm sewers," said Kidd. "There's no telling where it's going."
SRSLY people... the clean up crews need to step it up... BP and Transocean need to step it up.
And I saw a advertisement for a fund raiser... I am not donating shit. Want to know why? Cause it was a PREVENTABLE disaster.
BP should just write a fucking check. Period.
We pay for it every f&%$ing day. The lives lost the day of the accident. At the pump.  At the grocery store.  With the undeniable damage that is being to the ocean and the life that relies on it above and under water.
With that note. I'll end with a link from MSNBC again.

Aquarium exhibit loses sea life for spill, Idea is to show how disaster might impact corals, fish

Monday, June 7, 2010

No more contests

I have decided that contests just aren't my blog's thing. I have that coupon and I am going to pass it on to my friend who ranted at me about her cell phone carrier Saturday night.

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Hungry? Then start bitching!!

A contest? Yeah, I guess so, I have never done one before.

So, TGI Friday's has offered me a coupon.... for breakfast!!! For my loyal readers, (all 53 of you) I offer it up as a prize.... Here is the info: (and NO, I got nothing but the coupon for this)

For Immediate Release
Angela Vallera
RMD Advertising
(614) 794-2008
Pittsburgh Franchise Launches Traditional First Ever Breakfast Menu
T.G.I. Friday’s Debuts Sunday Breakfast in Greater Pittsburgh-area
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, (May 26, 2010) – The Bistro Group, the local franchisee of T.G.I. Friday’s Restaurants, is launching their first ever, an all-new Sunday breakfast menu. Available now, T.G.I. Friday’s will open their doors every Sunday morning at 9:00 a.m. to serve an original morning menu to better meet the needs of their customers in a fun, relaxed and enjoyable atmosphere.

Eight local stores including the Waterfront, Robinson Town Centre, Greensburg, Washington, Bethel Park, Monroeville, North Hills and Boardman are currently participating in the new Sunday breakfast. In celebration of the launch, the eight Pittsburgh-area T.G.I. Friday’s have launched a “buy one breakfast entree, get one free” breakfast special downloadable offer now until June 27.

“Our Pittsburgh-area Guests are some of the best the brand has,” shares Amie Dancu, Director of Marketing of the Bistro Group T.G.I. Friday’s franchisee. “We’re happy to begin offer our first ever Sunday breakfast menu for our Guests. Friday’s prides itself on the weekend crowd is a fun group – now they can come as early as 9:00 a.m.!” Guests will also be able to enjoy traditional brunch cocktails like Bloody Mary’s and Mimosa’s beginning at 11:00 a.m. on Sunday’s.

For more information on The Bistro Group, visit T.G.I. Friday’s restaurants in Download the “buy one breakfast entree, get one free” coupon at and on Facebook @ EatAtTGIFridays.

About The Bistro Group:

Headquartered in Cincinnati, Ohio, The Bistro Group is the nation’s second largest privately held franchisee of T.G.I. Friday’s restaurants. With more than 30 T.G.I. Friday’s across Ohio, Kentucky, Pennsylvania and West Virginia, The Bistro Group has successfully grown its family business over the past 20 years.

To enter, email me at rantpittsburgh @ your rant. About ANYTHING that makes you crazy. lol By Friday. Then over the weekend the Rant that makes me (and possibly random judges) laugh and enjoy the most, I will post as a guest rant and award the coupon to that person too! Its only good till 6/27, so, I don't want to drag this out!!

The ranting starts NOW!!

Sunday, May 30, 2010

Things that Piss me off... Oil Edition

Things that piss me off?

Like that mine the blew up recently and killed miners because the company did not follow safety rules.

Screw you Bp and Transocean.... I hate you hurting my earth. My daughter's earth. For profit and bullshit.

All this bullshit with this oil well leaking has really pissed me off. Oil companies are a fucking joke. Transocean not following safety rules. I saw a video today from MSNBC... as you know and old favorite of mine.

Watch the video. Know that in the background my head has exploded from the level of pissed off i am. So far they are sucking worse than the Pittsburgh Pirates, failing at everything to stop the giant fucking leak they tried to HIDE at first. Like nobody would fucking notice.... Assholes.

I hate BP, I will NEVER buy gas from them again even if it means I have to walk to another gas station.

The more spills change, the more they stay the same...
May 26: Rachel Maddow shares NBC News reports on from 1979 on the Ixtoc I oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico and the near mirror impotence and ineptitude in addressing the spill.

Friday, May 14, 2010

iPhone Killer revisited.

Last year I wrote this:

It almost a year later so for fun... lets review the new line up of  phones.... So, I googled "iPhone killers" to see who has had the name recently. First up:

Palm Pre/Pixie
This phone has FAILED epically after being stuck on shitty ass sprint for too long. When you need a 30 to 40 minute training to learn how to use it then its too f&^%ing complicated.

Google's Nexus One phone 
Launched on t mobile. Cant buy it in stores. Killed itself in favor of new htc phones further down.

Motorola Droid
Well, it saved the company from ending up like Palm. It is still very popular and A LOT of bb users gave up blackberry for droid.

Microsoft/Sharp "pink" phones. AKA Kin 1 and Kin Two.
Uh... yeah. The jury is out as the phones are just hitting the market...

Samsung galaxy s AND HTC EVO 4G
Both not released, but hyped very much. The Galaxy S is a gsm phone(t-mobile or at&t) and the EVO is currently on preorder trying to save Sprint's ass.

And finally:
HTC Droid Incredible (quoted from )
Unlike any other iPhone Killers in the past, this one truly has everything AND more than currently available iPhone 3GS. Not only are all the hardware spec superior (bigger and better screen, faster processor, better camera, etc.), the multi-tasking and multi-touch supported Android 2.1 OS is superior to Apple OS 3. The only lacking may be the availability of the Android apps (~50,000 versus Apple’s 200,000) but they are fast gaining as more and more Android based phones are out there.
The verdict? You still can't Kill the iPhone. But you can make something better than the iPhone and watch that shit go on a 20 day back-order because the reviews were so good that no advertising was needed.  HTC is gonna make a lot of money this year by getting awesome devices out before the next (slightly better than last year) stupid ass iPhone. You can't kill the masses of people who buy shit just cause its Apple. Look at the ipad. Its a giant iTouch. that's it. A net book with out a keyboard. Or any way to connect anything to it. STUPID.

Only Apple knows what the new iPhone will be. I am sure we could put a cat turd in a box call it iTurd  and Apple would sell a million of them  f&^%ers cause its Apple (OOOOO!! not)

Ouch. *sad*

Thanks for the good run Pens. I think you were just out of gas. It happens.

Pittsburgh loves you.

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

What a damn day.... It's a long rant.

I need to bitch. You know that's what you come to see... Me. Bitching.

It started with me needing to pick up a book at the library. Today was the last hold day. And the Blvd is always busy that time of day. On my way up I realized I didn't eat and I didn't have my sunglasses... Bad. Bad.
So, I zoom up to cvs first and grab a pair of sunglasses. (If I find them, mine other ones are bent anyway. I never spend more then $20 cause I am HARD on sunglasses) and a pasta bowl thing.

I get stuck in line.

I zoom the block to the library, practically run inside, run back out and jump in the car.

I get stuck in slow moving traffic.

I get past it and get down to 51. And head toward the (Swiss) Liberty Tunnels (of cheese walls) As I am the left lane, I intend to stay in the middle (matching) lane exit off 51 just exactly like the guy in front of me.

I get flipped off and almost wreaked into by Asshole in the right lane who assumed I was going to the far left to turn up west liberty. Slam on the breaks and slide to the right behind the guy as we switch lanes. So I can avoid him wreaking my freaking car.

Only to embark on the more common, but wholly irritating and SLOW, dungeon drive. The inbound tunnel lights are filthy and most of the reflective paint gone because they are redoing the inside wall. The dark freaks morons out and they do 30. If that, In the damn tunnel.  This continues across the bridge as the same Asshole now cuts off a driver, 2 cars in front of me to get BACK INTO RIGHT LANE.

*headsteeringwheel* The lack of food and considerably shortened my temper at this point.

This shit continues up crosstown blvd. And when I finally get around some of the morons, I head for the 279  ramp only to discover the newest annoying trend. Slowing down to 40 to get ON THE HIGHWAY. 

Around Westview, I catch up wit a dumb short little blond girl going  50. Then 70. Then 65. then 50. Then 70. I was stuck with her until  almost Bellevue, when she finally moved over. I had to go 70 so I could make to work in an enough time to eat. About 2 miles from 79 she BLOWS by me in the left lane doing about 80.

THE SECOND SHE SAW THE (nearly vacant)79 MERGE POINT, SHE SLOWED TO 50!!!! And you must know, so did the car in front of me. I thought my head might explode. I got behind the bimbo, checked 79, the moment I could do so safely, I shot across on to 79 to get away from her. Coincidentally, she suddenly speed up.

The pattern repeated itself the whole way to work. Traffic cutting me off or suddenly slowing down in front of me. People driving SUVs, but freaking out at the little inch bump to enter the parking lot? I wanna smack them. Its an OFF ROAD VEHICLE for goodness sake!!

I flipped out in the car. I ate at work. I felt better. Then it was time to go home.

I must remember to always EAT before I leave for work.

The night drive wasn't as eventful, but still annoying.
  • 279 was down to a single lane of SLOW (of course!!!) moving cars. Everyone had to gawk at the sign PennDot is taking apart for some reason.
  • I saw a girl pop her trunk on the liberty bridge and have to pull over to close it. (amusing)
  • One lane was closed on part of the bridge and in the entire outbound tunnel so that they could scrub the lights at the bridge *entrance* side. (which need it, but not as bad as the inbound does).
  • I observed the drunk in front of me play chicken with the tiny cones for the length of the tunnel. Its a miracle he didn't smash into the tunnel or knock a cone over. He came DAMN close to doing both. Of course the cones would have hurt his car less.
At this point I am happy that I made it to and from work alive with my head intact. I survived. Barely.
I am also a little drunk now too. I am off the next 2 days. thank gawd.

I feel better now.

(still hate 4 square.)

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Improved? Maybe

So, I refreshed the blog look. I figure with all the bitching I do here... It could at least be pretty and tranquil looking. You know, so your shocked when I start flipping a bitch about the Pirates and how much a minor team would do a better job. I am still tweaking it. So, things may still change.


P.P.S. I hate you  4Square.

Thursday, April 22, 2010

To refresh or not?

Blogger has recently added new stuff to the blog designer part... I was thinking of updating the design. changing the look of the blog. so for the 53 people who read this blog... i am proposing a poll before i actually make changes.

Yes or no?? vote in the poll pretty please with sugar on top


(still hate 4square)

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Open Letter to Pirates

Dear Management of the Pirates,

Step back and take a deep breath. Did you smell that? Do you feel that?


Do you know what that means?


Just to make this easier to understand for you.... I know there is only one language you idiots speak.


Do you understand that? Do see how excited people are that the pirates are in 2nd place? Look around. Smell the excitement and joy in the air. Note the large numbers of people who willing sit outside the arena to watch the hockey game on the big screen because the tickets are (wait for it) SOLD OUT.


And damn it Pirates, take notes and try to have a winning season. Please.

p.s. I still hate 4square.

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

An Open Letter to Assholes

Dear Any Steeler Player who has run-ins with Police (and not in a nice way)

I would like all of you to enroll in the Mario Lemieux School of Conduct. To learn to Fucking BEHAVE like ADULTS. I am sick to death of this bullshit. WTF is wrong with you??? I LOVE my Steelers. But right now I am pissed at several of you. You are PEOPLE, not gods. You are NOT above laws and morals.

Ben? All that extra time you seem to have to get your ass in trouble could be well spent in the GYM working off all the FAT an LAZY you have acquired recently. For the love of gawd, get a freaking hair cut, you mullet wearing idiot. I don't care how many Superbowl rings you have. Your pissing me off. Your pissing Pittsburgh off. As a football crazy city, you don't really wanna piss us off do you? So, go to the gym. Do something fucking productive. then go home and watch TV instead of whore trolling. We clear?

Jeff? How about no more drinky for your dumb ass. You are another one who should do some productive shit and then stay the hell home after dark. I don't want to hear any more about paper towel dispenser fights or you defending Matt's honor to pee all over South Side. SRSLY.

I'd planned to talk to Holmes next, but seeing as His Assholeness has been traded, there is no point. See ya, asshole.

I hope that trades and suspensions send a nice message. You know the "Don't be a damn asshole" message to the team. All of you ruined the reputation the Steelers organization had for not having trouble making, low life assholes on the team. Now you have to fix it by acting like normal people. This isnt the Ravens, or the Bengals. We are better than that and you are pissing all over it. STOP IT.

The next interviews I want to see better have charities or training camp in them.

Sunday, March 28, 2010

Weather and Traffic Rants

So, its raining today. (At least it was when I started this post on my lunch today) When I left for work it was pouring. And everyone on the road is like::


People... We just had 40 inches of snow. IN A MONTH. 20 inches at once. Who care about some rain??? srsly!!

And people who drive 20 miles an hour UNDER the speed limit and then RUN the red light or stop sign. SRSLY??? Drive the f&%$ing speed limit and you wont HAVE to run the light or stop sign

As much as I complain about traffic... it is WAY WAY better than the bus.
(aka Why Port Authority Sucks)

I can get to work in less than an hour. I used to work downtown. A whopping 15 minutes from Brookline but an incredible hour or so ride on the freaking bus. Now I work in Cranberry, 35 minutes away.

My car is always warm. I don't have to freeze my ass off (shivering with my coat on) all year long because the bus driver is from the north pole and feels the need to keep the bus at 7 degrees. EVERY DAY. If its cold in the car? My fault. I'll turn the heat on.

I never leave myself stranded at the bus stop hoping the driver is late and not that they didn't show up for work. Leaving me to regret not walking to the bus way first.

There is always a place to sit. And its not a broken seat either.

Also, I don't miss these things either:

Nobody asks me if I want to take the bus home with them and "drink booze."

There is no loud mouthed bitch yelling at her kids (while on the bus) on her cell phone for calling her 27 times in the HOUR ride home from town to ask when she is coming home.

There are no culinary students with 42 pieces of luggage taking up 3 seats and blocking the aisle.

Nobody asks me for money so that they can get back to Atlanta (while speaking pittsburghese fluently).

I do miss the smithfield street church. If one of my readers walks by there regularly, I would love a pic of their message boards so I could revive Love this Church...

Thursday, March 11, 2010

Observations from the Home n Garden show

Recently, I attended the home n garden show in an effort to look and compare new windows. My two very large front windows are 50 years old and SUCK. I am replacing them with 4 smaller windows. Here are my observations:

There was only one vendor selling flower and veggie seeds. And a handful selling plants. But probably 50 vendors selling giant hot tubs for $7000. Srsly. Gian,t pimp hot tubs with 200 jets, 27 lighting effects, surround sound and mini fountains. *shakes head*

I wish there had been more *garden* in the home and garden show.

People who go to the home and garden show Sunday morning and pay $10 a beer to drink while walking around CLEARLY have a drinking problem. Why else are you getting drunk at 11am for $10 A BEER???

Window salesmen should NEVER start a pitch with: "The president personally endorsed these windows."
First, it is an out right LIE. The president did not endorse a particular company. Second, You don't know the person your selling to, or their political leanings. FAIL.
While on the subject of windows.... Everyone puts gas in between the double panes now, what matters is the FRAME. So, don't tell me your company is the only one to do it. I talked to 12 window companies and half claimed they were the only ones to use the stupid krypton gas or what the hell ever its is called. FAIL again.

My final bitch today is at 4square.
OMG!! This app is RUINING my twitter feed. Its nothing for me to have 60 out of 100 tweets at a time on my phone that are stupid 4square posts. So, a couple friends and I have decided to do Fakesquare. This way we can at least be amused by tweets instead of stalking people on their mundane, boring, stupid errands. I don't wish to be stalked and I don't wish to stalk anyone. so you will never find me on 4square.

Saturday, February 27, 2010

SnOMFG! I am SICK of SNOW!!!

I swear to god, I have **HAD** it with snow.

We have MORE snow than freaking Alaska!!! Thats just WRONG.
I saw these tweets from Jeff Verszyla (
@verz) Friday night. He is Kdka's weather man. (that I love cause he tweets me back):

Snowapalooza stats...feb 5-26...13 days w/ measurable snow, snow total = 42.2
(in 3 weeks!)...avg high = 34 (normal hi is 41) about 9 hours ago via web

AND Later in the evening:

Ready 2 close snow shop for business 2day...latest total for feb 2010, for season 73.8"...please stop, now! about 2 hours ago via web

I am sick of the "death grip on the steering wheel" drive this month or the near death experience of sliding across route 228 because despite the heavy traffic on the road... it SUCKS every. single. time. it snows. I saw 4 accidents on the way home tonight on 79 & 279.

I think we should be grateful that PennDOT put up all those weird little bars, with and with out the cables along 79 and 279. I predict that when the snow melts, FINALLY, that we will see how many cross over accidents they prevented due to this Shitty, Stupid, F&%$ing Snow.

I *promise* that when its humid and 90 in a couple months, you wont hear a PEEP of complaints from me.
Or scrape it off your car, or fall in it and get dirty wet snow all over you. Or skid and slide the whole way home from work.
Cause dumb people wont stop in the middle of the highway (asshole) because its TOO SUNNY. (I didn't make that up.)
Proof that really happened from the PG:

"At least she wasn't texting" Feb 12, 2010

From the Beaver County Times: Since the snow started falling last Friday, local emergency officials have sent a consistent message: If you don’t have to go out on the roads, or you’re afraid of driving in the snow, just stay home. PennDOT spokesman Jim Struzzi said the best example why officials have been urging that happened shortly after 9 a.m. Wednesday. As the heavy snow was winding down, a woman was driving a small car in the right lane on I-376 in Robinson Township, near the off-ramp leading to The Pointe at North Fayette and Robinson Town Centre.

Struzzi said the woman, who wasn’t named, apparently became frightened because of the poor road conditions and didn’t want to drive anymore, so she simply stopped her car in the right lane.
That created problems for other motorists who were sliding on slush to get around the woman, Struzzi said. PennDOT crews saw the car on surveillance cameras and sent out a member of the agency’s Parkway Service Patrol to help the woman.

Struzzi said that when a member of the patrol arrived, they found the woman sitting in her car, reading a book, waiting for storm conditions to improve.

That's right kids, read that again.... SHE WAS READING A BOOK ON THE HIGHWAY. I think my brain wants to implode. What makes a person think that it is SAFE to stop in the MIDDLE of the highway EVER, and throw it in park??? And THEN whip out a book!!!???
I would love to find that lady and CLUB her in the head with that f&%$ing book. She is too stupid to be allowed to drive. Or even breathe. The highways have a shoulder to pull over on for a reason for goodness sake.

Btw, I disabled Anonymous comments on my blog because people were calling me racist and a coward over a sarcastic guest post from a reader, but were too much a coward to IDENTIFY themselves.
SO, F&%$ You. You want to call me names in comments??? OWN UP TO IT. BITCH.

Monday, February 8, 2010

Pittsburgh SnOMG!!!!

The links below are to the same pics, but if you prefer one over the other, I put both up. The Picasa site doesn't have all the captions though... I'll work on it. Right after it *doesn't* snow 6 more damn inches on Tuesday. I literally don't have any place else to put snow. The piles in my yard are nearly 5 1/2 foot high now. I'm afraid to throw my kid in the yard... I may lose her. (lol)

Public Facebook link:
SnOMG Feb 2010 Pictures

Picasa Link:
SnOMG Feb 2010 Pictures

Its the 4th worst storm in Pittsburgh history.
21.1 inches at Pittsburgh International. (which was closed for like 24 hrs. That NEVER happens)
20 inches in my yard.

Next 24 hours 'important' in city's efforts to clear streets

With nearly three decades of snow removal experience, Mr. Kaczorowski said this is the worst snow he has had to battle.

"This is the worst," he said after 36 hours on duty. "This is worse than '93."

This weekend's snowfall of 21.1 inches was, according to the National Weather Service, the fourth highest accumulation in Pittsburgh since 1876, when the agency began keeping records. The third biggest snowfall, with 25.3 inches, was March 12-14, 1993.
The difference between the 1993 blizzard and this one? This snowfall was wet and heavy, '93 was a dry snow. I hate this shit. It broke our shovel. It was a bitch to clear.
And there is more coming.

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Mall of Death

Some of you have seen my tweets and complaints about the local mall, Century III Mall. In its day, that mall was the place to be. It has a unique tri-split level layout:

(more Mall of Death Pics HERE, if your curious)

In any case, the mall's current owner has let the mall deteriorate badly and one whole section of the mall is closed. There are many vacant storefronts and that concourse pictured above is no longer crowded like it used to be. They moved the food court a couple years back, to this very depressing corner where all 3 levels meet, including the dead section that's closed. The lighting blows and the ceiling clearance is about 9 feet. It's a shitty place for the food court. Especially when you compare it to a place like Ross Park Mall.
One of my readers had the chance to spend extended time at the Mall Of Death today. Inspired by my tweets and complaints, I was sent this: (A Guest Rant)

So here's what Mayor D is going to do with Century III Mall. Gonna close it immediately! Then we're gonna take the mall and convert it to a multi purpose facility. I'm going section it all up!

One section is going to be a medical facility that will serve as an annex to Jefferson Hospital. We'll have doctors and specialists and rehab here.

Another section is going to be a bus lounge were riders can shoot each other in comfort while waiting for a bus transfer. Yes, shoot each other in comfort...and they can do drugs and get high and have babies on the couch and be prostitutes and do all those other wonderful things that bus riders en route to clariton enjoy. 61c Mckeesport baby....keepin it real, man keepin it real!

Then we're going have a big fitness center here with nutritionists and cooking classes and health experts!

Finally, we will have another section that's gonna be an annex to CCAC south campus with more classrooms and computer training and such.

I'll make the Bus Lounge real nice. Lcd screens for all... 1 screen shows bus schedules, another shows available prostitutes with rates, another gives real time price quotes for an ounce of crack.... I'm going to have a vending machine in my bus will be stocked with disposable needles, condoms, tampons, cigarettes, and Advil. The Bus Lounge will be a great hit!

I probably will keep a few stores here...but only a handful. They are mostly gonna be shoe stores, beauty salons, tanning places, and nail salons. I'll reopen the kfc that used to be here too. Inside will be payless shoes, Gabriel brothers, salvation army. And goodwill. Other anchor stores will be the unemployment office, ace cash express, my bus lounge, and a family planning clinic.

I'll put some branch office banks and atms here too! If you need money, you can just conveniently rob the bank, so you have money to pay for the prostitute that's gonna ride the bus home with you tonight!
See how easily I can improve peoples lives??!! Giving back to the community man, that's what its all about. I'm telling you....I got a higher calling in life!

I've been coming to this mall since I've been 5 years old....I can tell you whatever you need to know about it and what's going happen after it closes... The people from clariton who will make full use of my bus lounge are the reason why the mall is what it is today.