I challenge you to stop it.

I am a little cranky today. It happens.
I will probably offend people here today.
Sorry in advance.
I need to blow off some steam.

I am sick of the "challenges." Just when everyone stopped trying to shame everyone else in to dumping cold water on their head,  in the middle of summer, for a charity that they may or may not have donated to, who uses their money mainly for research.... A new "challenge" has popped up all over my facebook feed this morning.

MATH. Subtraction something or other.

It is a challenge to LIVE YOUR DAMN LIFE.

I get annoyed by the need for some people to tell everyone that they are better than others because they are doing this challenge, or that challenge. There is a challenge for 17 different exercises, dieting, for cleaning out email,  for donating to charities, for dumping toilet water on your head, for volunteering and I'm sure there are more.


How about you just do it and not try to harass everyone else to do it.


I love social media. I tweet about the most mundane stuff and people tweet back sometimes. But I am not challenging people "to do the same things I am or you suck" stuff either. Just do it. When someone specifically asks why you are so happy (or soaked with toilet water?) you can say, "Oh, I took the 'life is more than 100 million social challenges' challenge and just spent time not on the electronic stuff for a bit each day.

So, I challenge the general public and media, to stop with all the ridiculous "I am better than you because I did this challenge and so I'm going to post it everywhere 50 times to prove it!" crap.

Please.

Black Friday is a LIE

Reading the myriad of new reports about "Black Friday" and the retailers trying to one up each other this year makes me want to smack someone in the head. I feel like I need to get a calendar out and teach retailer CEO's the days of the week again. My 1st grader knows them. So, I would assume that once you get disgustingly rich, and never work on holidays, you must forget the days of the week.


First, IT IS NOT BLACK FRIDAY SALE IF YOU'RE OPEN ON THURSDAY. PERIOD.
Thursday ≠ Friday. Ever.
Example:

"Kmart announced that the stores that long promoted "blue light specials" will be open AT 6AM on Thanksgiving morning until 11 p.m. Friday night.
Sears stores will work a less aggressive schedule, opening from 8 p.m. on Thanksgiving night to 10 p.m. Friday."

That means, people do not get to spend time with their families, on a FAMILY holiday. Also, IT IS NOT BLACK FRIDAY SALE IF YOU ARE OPEN ON THURSDAY. I don't understand the confusion here. You can't have a Black Friday sale if the day of the sale is NOT FRIDAY

"Some malls and even Target, Macy’s and JC Penny will open at 8 PM Thanksgiving Day for the beginning of the Black Friday deals."

I love you Target, but come on. I expect better.

Can we have one damn day a year? Retail and customer service doesn't deserve ONE DAY OFF from humanity and its general rudeness??? Really? It can't wait until FRIDAY?

Now, that we have established that 'Black Friday' means nothing since stores are opened for the same sales on days that are NOT Fridays... Why stop at Thursday??? If you really want to win this game, you have to think outside the box.

Let's have Black Friday on the MONDAY of Thanksgiving week. Hell, why bother with just a week early? Let's smash the competitors and start with the first Friday of November and call THAT Friday, Black Friday instead. Retailers are always moaning about the short holiday shopping season. So, why not move "Black Friday" a couple weeks so that people can spend one damn holiday with family. JUST ONE.

Amazon and Wal-Mart are already on that idea of starting holiday sales right after Halloween. Both of them started their sales November 1st.

For the record, I have never shopped on Black Friday. I have worked in retail for it in the past, and people who go out and shop on Black Friday, are INSANE. You know what? I have to deal with insanity, rudeness and mean people every single work day.
I have to work Thanksgiving.
I have to work the day after.
I'll probably have to work Christmas eve, Christmas day and New Years.
I miss every holiday.
It sucks.

It would be nice if we, the holiday deprived, could get ONE DAMN HOLIDAY OFF.

Random Rants

Sports pain...

I will say what we are all thinking after they lost 55-31 today.

Go home steelers, you're DRUNK.

What happens when you overspend on one player and then shop at the dollar store for the rest of the team? Yeah. I know. Right? Or Maybe the Pirates passed on the Loseritis to them.

KEEP ALL THE STEELERS AWAY FROM THE HOCKEY TEAM, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD.


Open letters

Dear Coworker,

Stop wearing pajama pants to work. STOP IT. It takes all of ONE WHOLE MINUTE to put on a pair of jeans. And if you are using that one minute to put ON the pajama pants? You really need to evaluate your LIFE. Pajama Pants are not intended to be worn to work. OR EVEN OUTSIDE.
At this point, yoga pants, leggings, and pajama jeans are way more appropriate clothing to wear to work.
Have you ever heard the expression "dress for the job you want, not the job you have?" Is your desired job Homeless Person? I don't expect you to go all out, but you know, executives pass through our building, you could at least LOOK like you work for the damn company.
Seriously.



Dear Cats,

Knock your shit off at 5 am. You can play on the ENTIRE 1st floor. I would prefer to sleep rather than be assaulted by cats chasing each other all over my bedroom at 5 in the morning. And I would love if you played with the 204857594 toys down there instead of knocking all my stuff off my vanity at 6 am.
OK?
ok.


Yeah. I'm living a pipe dream. I know it. Tonight cats are going to pull my hair or sit on my chest and suffocate me, and I'll see pajama pants at work tomorrow, I'm sure.

My favorite line of the week:

"I spend all day at work NOT telling people how I really feel, so it all has to come out some time!"

Drunken road work

I have come to the conclusion that the people who plan and execute our road work around here are either drunk or effing with the rest of us.


Take this article:

Lack of traffic police makes West Carson Street mess much worse

Over an hour to go from the fort pitt bridge to the west end. Ridiculous.

Now, I may be taking a very simplistic view of this but.... They KNEW this was going to an extended road closure, because THEY PLANNED it. Why would they rely solely on off duty cops? And now there is 'he said, she said' going on between the contractor and police resulting in no cops for a week.

Here is a novel idea, adjust the timers on the 5 traffic lights involved, to be LONGER INTERVALS during rush hour. I know its probably not that easy, but it has to cost less than $500,000 we are paying for nobody to be there at all. WTF. It is a 2 year closure, this is a significant amount of time.

The there is 65. And its drunk repaving. I drove through there today. OMFG. 
First, they have several miles closed where there is no work being done AT ALL because they are WAY over on the other side of 65. Like 7 miles away.

The lanes are so narrow that a large greyhound bus had to crawl through at 20 miles an hour or knock over all the construction flags. Which, by the way, were as straight as a drunk guy on an all night bender trying to convince a cop he was sober. 

instead of finishing one section at a time, the are milling different spots and doing first layer paving on others... There seems to be no rhyme or reason to the pattern at all.


My other favorite construction area is in cranberry where they are going to make the bridge on 228 (that crosses over 79) wider, along with the road and new ramps. PennDot is NOT EVEN CLOSE to finishing these ramps, and they already painted new lane markings for the ramps. Ramps that do not exist. The traffic patterns are going to have to change a couple more times for paving and stuff... WHY PAINT NOW?


*sigh*

Bitch, Please. #RollsEyes

Well... I finally got to catch up on the Applebee story. I do have a few opinions on the matter. (Shocked? Didn't think so.)

I love how the "pastor" is "sorry" for what she wrote, now,  in this Smoking Gun Story. You know what? She is only "sorry" because she got called out. She was so full of herself and how special she thinks SHE is, that she wrote her name AND added the "Pastor" to her little nasty remark.

HEY LITTLE MISS THANG, NORMAL GRATUITY IS 15%. WHAT makes you SOOOOOO special that you don't have to tip at all? If you were unhappy with your service you should have talked to the manager on duty. THAT is why they are there.

Yes. I know the girl that took the picture of the receipt and posted it was fired because it showed the name of the pastor. Yes. I know this was NOT the person who waited on her.

I used to wait on tables. You make a crappy $2.13 an hour. PLUS TIPS. In a lot of places you now have to SHARE tips with the busboys (who make minimum wage if not more.) and bartenders (who get their own damn tips) too. To be clear, 18% gratuity is STANDARD for parties of 8 or more for as long as I can remember, She was in a party of 10. (per the news)

If your waiter or waitress bust their ass for you, you should tip them. It is appalling that people have become so rude and thoughtless. In researching, I found a pic of a $138 restaurant bill that says "single mom, sorry" in the tip line. EFF YOU BITCH. Liar. You have a $138 to eat and drink, then you can tip the poor person who was forced to take care of your greedy ass.

Then there was one where someone left a pre-typed note claiming that they couldn't afford to tip because of a new tax in California. Let us cut to the chase... Who ever that was? TOTAL COMPLETE ASS. The waitstaff has to pay taxes too, you know. They know. They don't care.
Everyone like this, thinks they are special, they are ABOVE the rules.
Everyone like this, thinks that exceptions are meant for them.
Everyone like this is, thinks they are "entitled."


Everyone like this, is full of shit.

Money. Money. Money.

On my break today, I saw this article. It started with a girl who has 7 destination weddings in less than 12 months, 10 vacation days and recently spent over $2000 just to attend ONE of the 7 weddings. 
ONE.
http://www.cnn.com/2012/06/15/travel/obligation-travel/index.html?hpt=hp_c1
Now, I may be bitchy about this... This is a blog where I rant...
I love you dear friends. But I'm not spending OVER $2000 to observe any of you get married. I simply don't have that kind of money.
I will be damned if some CNN article is going to make me feel bad because I can't afford to and have to say no.
(As a side note, none of my friends are getting married this yr and all of them are nice enough to not lay a guilt trip on me if I couldn't afford it.)
According to CNN, I "have no excuse" Not to attend events like weddings and such if it is in the US.
Um yeah. I havent gotten to see the ocean.
Because I can't afford it.
I am pretty sure I can't afford a $1000 trip to Miami for a BACHELORETTE PARTY.  Or $4000 for a trip to the Caribbean. (Students using their student loan money apparently)
The moral of this rant is that if your "closest," "best" friends and family can't understand if you can't afford a super expensive Bridal shower, bachelorette party and wedding, then they are materialistic assholes you don't need to have in your life.

Why are they still TRYING?

Today, I saw a headline on CNN Money: "Blackberry's iPhone killer leaks."

And I immediately want to kick someone.

The FIRST mistake in the headline? "Blackberry's." The CORRECT company name is RESEARCH IN MOTION, CNN Money.

The SECOND mistake is "iPhone Killer."

HAVE WE NOT LEARNED, CNN Money? YOU CANT KILL THE IPHONE. ITS A PLAGUE WITH NO CURE.

I wrote about "iPhone Killers 2 other times in this blog.

iPhone killer? Shut up already.

iPhone killer revisted


NOTHING HAS CHANGED. SINCE 2009. Apple screwed up maps SO BAD, they had to publicly apologize. People still bought the phones. People still lie, cheat, steal and scam to get stupid iPhones like they do for NO OTHER DEVICE. #FirstHandKnowledge

Let's look at the (shortest) list for 2012 of phones that should have committed 1st degree murder:

Htc one x .... Fabulous device. Only available on GSM carriers like AT&T on the US side of the ocean

Windows 8 phone.... Just not going to happen. It's a cool OS. There are some great phones, but they just aren't highly sought after.

BB 10 Phones: It's too early to tell how well the market will receive the new phones since they haven't launched yet. 

Galaxy S 3... Probably the only smart phone in 4 years to outsell an iPhone. Samsung worked for apple for a long time and the device they made partnered with the excellent marketing is as close as you will ever get to killing iPhone. Which is still not going to die any time soon. All you have to do is observe the masses who bought iPad minis made with the 3 yr old screen from the original iPad to know I am telling the truth.

So, stop it. Stop trying to declare new phones as "iPhone killers." Stop trying. I mean it. #MomLook 

Criminals Failing at Technology

Today at lunch, I read an article about crime and how Facebook, twitter, etc can be used against you.

IF YOU ARE AN IDIOT.

The article on USAToday :  Facebook, MySpace social media musings used in court cases

Now, not all the idiots are criminals... My FAVORITE line is this :

...federal prosecutors alleged that a Hells Angels member threatened a witness via a Facebook "poke" — a trivial Facebook communications technique...

HAHAHAHAHA

Thankfully, SOMEONE was smart enough to realize how much of nothing a standard "poke" is on fb.

 Federal prosecutors were not as successful with claims that a Facebook "poke" was an instance of threatening intimidation. They urged a judge to revoke the parole of a Hells Angel member, but the judge refused.

Now, if it had been a "super poke," they could have "thrown a cupcake at..." and this would be a whole different ballgame. #Snickering

My personal opinion is that if you still use MYSPACE in 2011 to organize your GANG? You are a failure as a GROUP.

Yes. you read that correctly.

In a July 2011 trial of Wolf Pack gang members, accused of terrorizing a Rochester neighborhood and violently chasing away drug-dealing competitors, federal prosecutors used MySpace postings to prove that the accused were part of a loosely knit gang.

I know!! MYSPACE... HAHAHA Did they all have AOL accounts too???
Glad you were all busted, LOSERS.


As a reminder, Posting to anything publicly is like talking to a crowded room. Post wisely, or lock it all down private. Even then... Think before you type. I don't want to make fun of you on my blog.

Are We Really THIS STUPID?

Today, I opened up the USA Today online at lunch time. While scanning through the articles I saw THIS headline:

Teens at high risk in car surfing

BEFORE you click. READ that again. WHO isn't at risk? The headline almost implies that, I don't know, some adults aren't at risk. Or maybe lower risk? Point is, badly worded headline.

To save your brain from hurting, We will discuss the article here.
It is really, really simple:

RIDING ON THE OUTSIDE OF A 2000-3000 POUND MOVING VEHICLE CAN LEAD TO YOUR DISMEMBERMENT, GOING TO JAIL OR DEATH, KIDS.

These days, honestly? I'm feeling like if you think this is a FANTASTIC idea? Then you DESERVE the consequences. Seriously. This is natures way of removing SOME of the stupid from the gene pool. It has to be done some how these days. 

I never car surfed. I never had the urge to car surf. And good grief, my parents never had to talk to me about car surfing. I had this magical thing called common sense and a concept of "the consequences of my actions."

Parents, BE parents to your children. Our jobs are not to be their friend. It is a hard and thankless job for many years. I would really rather not read shit like16yr olds getting killed because of amazing stupidity.

More rants inspired by politics.

Good reads. SRSLY
http://twokidsandabeagle.blogspot.com/2012/02/on-why-birth-control-matters.html
http://redpenmamapgh.com/2012/02/17/thinking-aloud-the-fight-about-birth-control/
I love these ladies
I need them on my blog roll as soon as I get to a pc.

Politics can EFF off.

Seriously.

#AngryRant

I could never marry a politician because the first time he made some ass-hatted move regarding MY RIGHT to regulate MY BODY? I would punch him right in crotch and tell him him that if I catch him touching himself later, it was going to happen again. Since ALL these MEN in political office think they have the right to govern a woman's body, why can't we govern them? We should have a say in all of the way HIS reproductive system works, right??? Contrary to popular belief, women don't go on the pill so they can "whore it up" all over town. So what if they did, at least they are being responsible.

Oh I forgot, only men are allowed to plow anything that moves.
#Proof:

Friess told NBC's Andrea Mitchell on "Andrea Mitchell Reports":

This contraceptive thing, my gosh, it's so inexpensive. Back in my days, they used Bayer aspirin for contraceptives. The gals put it between their knees, and it wasn't that costly.

The obvious suggestion by Friess: that women should put an aspirin between their legs so they don’t open them.

Asshole. I would have called him that right on TV.  FINE ME. Please.

We are denying or flipping out over sex education... FOR WHAT? You NEED a drivers license to operate a Mother Effing CAR. Shouldn't you NEED to know HOW your body WORKS before you take IT out of the garage??!! for gawd sakes. There are BIRTH CONTROL HEARINGS IN 2012!!!

Gay people can't get married.... WHY NOT? THEY aren't the ones screwing up the "institution of marriage," WE ARE DOING IT ALL BY OURSELVES. Hell, it would help our mother effing economy if they could. AGAIN, WHY DOES IT MATTER IF THEY ARE GAY????? I am positive nobody EVER uttered the words "Well, if it wasn't for that gay couple that got married last year, I would still be with my wife."

All this political bullshit, over a PILL that helps hormonal balance. So, us here womens don't go all crazy like and not be able to make do for ourselves. Men, they needs to save us. #NutPunch

Nobody fucking cares that gas prices are almost $4 fucking dollars, that we work our asses off to keep from losing our jobs (which we have to drive further to find). While employers ship more jobs to china, where people work for pennies to build an $800 iPad so that Apple can make money to sue anyone who dares to innovate.
Nobody cares that our children in school are lacking the education desperately needed to compete in the WORLD markets these days.

I think there should be a new way.

I think that Political Jobs should pay no more than $35,000 a year.
Normal health insurance
401k similar to the average large employer.
No lifetime ANYTHING.
No campaign spending allowed.
None of this spend 8000 years in office. After 4 terms? DONE. MOVE ON. The same president can't be elected more than twice, neither should YOU.
Nobody over the age of 62. period. If you can get as seniors discount, you shouldn't be in office. Minimum age should be 21.

Of course, I didn't think of everything... But anything to get the old, ignorant, prejudiced, short sighted, greedy, corrupted, good ol boys club, assholes out of office works for me.

Now, I can go study. Cause even though I have these here boobs, I also possess brains cells that let me learn stuffs.

/End sarcastic pissed off rant

WHY we all have Car Insurance

If I had written this blog post earlier in the day it would have looked like this probably:
djinfnuf nebdujeij $*&! &#*%
I'll explain.
Nearly 3 weeks ago, when I was visiting "Mother Of One Thru Four," my car was hit. I'll call that girl: Bambi.
I park in the SAME spot every. Single. Time. I visit MOOTF. Sometimes, I visit MOOTF twice a week. When I visit, it's usually for a few hours. So, You know, MY CAR IS THERE A LOT.
Anyway. Bambi was backing out of her sister's driveway and backed right into my car.

I was nice. I didn't throw a fit or call the cops or lie and say she did more damage than that very nice crease in the fender. There was a small dent from when a deer bounced off the car years ago. The door has a bit of damage from that deer too. We looked at the car. Took pictures, agreed on what was new. I told her that the fender was now creased so more than likely it would need replaced.
Even I know you can't "uncrease" metal.
She asked me if she could call me with the insurance information when she got home. Bambi had a baby in the little suv and she wanted to talk to her husband about paying out of pocket. Being the nice, non asshole person I am? I said OK.

I went inside and described the incident to MOOTF. Bambi called me with the insurance info, then gave me bullshit (should have been my first clue) about not paying to fix something she didn't damage. (The door) I told her I would get estimates for the fender, after she gave me more grief about the insurance.
For a moment, I felt like I was talking to a customer at work. One who had gone over her minutes, knew she went over the minutes, had refused our offer to increase minutes but still wanted credits for ALL of the overage. (My Brain Hurt.)
This was a Thursday. I worked My usual schedule. So Tuesday, I go to a dealer and ask for an estimate for only the fender.
$970.

I showed it to MOOTF that day. I have a car with a METAL BODY. Not plastic. Metal is expensive.
Later, I call Bambi and give her the bad news. She has the balls to insinuate that I should not have the fender fixed. I very nicely tell her that she really needs to call her insurance. SINCE SHE HASN'T AT THIS POINT. The insurance company might have a place I can take it to, I say. So, she said she will call her agent in the morning. At the urging of a friend, I get a 2nd estimate at a body shop the next day. "Body shops are cheaper than a dealer."
$1200.

THE INSURANCE Company finally calls me while I was waiting for the write up of the estimate. I tell her that I don't care who pays for the fender. I just want it fixed. (My Mistake.) She tells me that THEY HAVE A PLACE IN WEXFORD. Three damn miles from the dealer I went to the day before. Only they can't get me in till Thursday. I waste my 45 minute lunch to rush over for the estimate. We discuss that I will need a rental car since they will need 2 days. He says he will call me when the fender is in. Rush back to work. His estimate before the approximate $250 for the rental I will need and not be paying for?
$720

That was 1/12. I called the claims agent 1/17. She informs me that Bambi hasn't returned her call. I had a 5 year old to throw a birthday party for and had to manage that this past weekend. So, I focused on the party. Today, I get a voicemail right before lunch time.
It is a fucking (see how long that took?) minute and a half of Bambi telling me that she is still TRYING TO DECIDE if she is going to pay for it. Why? WHY? Because the mean old insurance company can't quote her an exact figure of how much her insurance will go up.
Look, I have been patient and nice. But you know what? It's nearly $1000 no matter which way you cut it. Your fucking insurance is not going up $1000. Unless you wreck into things all the damn time. THIS is why people act like assholes, call the cops, yell, and throw fits over minor fender benders.
She has until Friday. On Friday, I'm calling that agent and telling the agent I want the insurance company to pay for it. Bambi has had more than enough time.
If her sister didn't live across the street from MOOTF, I would have called today.

If you got this far, the moral of the story is : Don't be an asshole. If it is your fault, let your damn insurance take care of it. That is what the fuck you pay them for. Period.

NO fainting

I took a break from blogging here. An extended vacation... Since then Facebook has effed itself up so bad that I pretty much give up on it.
I've decided that Klout is the most ridiculous waste of time EVER.  And people who think the real world actually cares about their Klout scores need smacked.
Really hard.
Upside the of their heads.
Did I mention hard?
I'm giving myself 100,000,000 points in FakeKlout for rants.  There. I rule the #fakesquare and and Fakeklout world. Fake getglue can kiss my ass. I don't have cable or satellite. It annoys the shit out of me too. Let's make them all 1 effing tweet for my amusement.
Checking in on my sofa, while checking in at watching a tv show on getglue and giving klout points to myself for being a jag off?
Not that I'm angry about it or anything. I love my time line being littered with automated useless posts.
I love you my friends, really. I do.

The Damn Highway "Police"

Ok. So. Everyone who knows me knows that I, more often than not, never drive the speed limit. In the interest of @beaglehq not tracking my ass down and writing me tickets... I'm not saying how fast I drive. LOL.

What drives this post (see that? Made a pun Hahahaha) today is a new thing I have noticed on the highways recently. It's become very very aggravating. I call them "speed police." These are people who see you rolling up the highway doing *cough* mph and decide your going too fast. So, what they do is shoot out in to the passing lane and refuse to move back or pick up the effing pace. In some cases, I have seen them slow to below the speed limit or matching speeds with a car in the right lane so that everyone is stuck behind them. Thus causing a traffic jam on the damn highway at rush hour when we are all in a damn hurry. I always end up stuck behind 3-4 cars who are being held up by someone who woke up on the Jagoff side of the bed.

We are in a hurry for a REASON.
It's called the wexford exit of agony construction.

So please, "speed police," stop being assholes. We weren't bothering you in the slow lane. We weren't tailgating anyone. We are just trying to get to work for goodness sake.
If some of us want to drive *cough*, then that is on us if we get a ticket.
Don't glare with anger at the people who decided to pass you on the right side because you refused to get in the NON-passing lane. They followed you for a couple miles while you did [much slower speed] intentionally. You put everyone in foul moods because we know its gonna be at least 15-20 minutes just to get thru that small work zone.

Also when getting on 79 from 228 there is almost NO EXCUSE to not be doing 65 (the speed limit there) at the end of the 4 mile long on ramp.  Jez!!! I have almost been nailed by people while trying to merge because they are not even CLOSE to the highway speeds at the end of the ramp. Or they slam on their brakes just as they merge.

WHY DO YOU THINK IT IS SO LONG???
So that you can MERGE with traffic. Not so you can attempt to cause a pile up there.

Stop being rude. Stop almost causing accidents. Please. (See that? I was nice and said please.)

Ps. I hate 4square. I loathe 4square day and how it blew up my Twitter feed with over 100 of that same damn mother effing post in the span of a couple hours.  Please, my dear Twitter friends.... I love you. But you guys are killing me here. Does it really need to be posted to Twitter that you unlocked 4sq day???? 100 times?

This is why fakesquare is returning with my own brand of twistedness.

Pps. Get glue? You are cruising to end up on my shit list too. But your not there yet.

Suck it PennDOT.

Tis the season traffic and gas prices make me want to weep with despair. Looks like I'm going to have to cancel my trip to Georgia this summer. I can't afford to drive there now and I'm not brave enough to take Julia on a plane myself for the first time ever, for both of us.
So...  Closer to home it is. :-(

Liberty tunnels of doom.

I will call them that until they put some Gawd damn lights back in there. I really REALLY have no clue what they are doing. Other than being dumb. I've been at current job for almost 2 yrs. They have been working on the tunnels that long. I saw the resurfacing of the walls. I saw some washing of ceiling and walls.
What gets me are the lights. On both sides, they spent WEEKS cleaning the lights on one side of the each tunnel.
Guess what???
The effers took down the lights they cleaned!!!! Weeks wasted. To removed the clean lights and leave the filthy ones. So its still like doom in there while they install new lights in the now dirty (again) and UNPAINTED tunnels.
Isn't it easier to clean and paint BEFORE you put up new lights????
Idiots.

Wexford Exit of Agony.

I don't think I can better describe the bridge reconstruction any better. Really.

Eff PATransit

There are several reasons I am thankful I don't ride buses anymore.... Even when I complain about the shit on 79 north. It is ALWAYS better than a bus. Over the last few days... I have felt compelled to write about this.
A tweet from PGHtraffic on 3/28. When it was like 20*

Early word is most @PGHtransit svc running smoothly but trips missed on some routes. Dress warm and be patient. #pittsburgh #transit

Angie's Translation:
Dear riders, We cut service and decided to EFF some more of you over by not effing SHOWING UP. Hope you didn't need to go to work.
Signed, Assholes who work at PAT

From this article in the PG Onorato: No deal better than bad deal with Port Authority workers

Mr. Onorato acknowledged that the proposals were "tough" but said he was disappointed neither was put to a union vote. "The drivers never got to see it. They have no idea what's in there," he said.
He said the authority currently is paying $31.5 million a year for health care for 3,300 retirees -- more than the 2,700 active employees who get it. By contrast, the much bigger SEPTA transit agency in Philadelphia spends $8 million, he said.

Angie Translation:
We pay more people more money to  people who are *not* employees than we have actually working. And by working we include the ones who are habitually late or skip trips and never can be fired cause the union nedz moneyz 4 duez.

Headline I saw in the PG today

 Port Authority union willing to restart talks

Angie Translation:
OMG they called our service cut bluff FINALLY!!!! AHHHH !!! The union nedz those moneyz from duez but we have to lay paying members off!!!

I can attest there are decent drivers, and they put up with tons of shit including nut cases and buses that are literally falling apart. As for PAT and the union?  I say... let them go bankrupt. Eff it. They did this to themselves by being damn greedy.  
$31.5 million a year for health care for 3,300 retirees????
So, yeah. Let them go bankrupt. Lose all their benefits. Crumble to bits. Creditors will fight over the parts. Debit will be written off.  Retirees will find themselves like the rest of the effing US economy. There would be hardly any service for a while and traffic will be hideous.

Hopefully, from it would rise a leaner less bullshit heavy transit system. The current one is such a damn mess. Its almost pointless to try and save it. We go thru this shit EVERY YEAR. The transit system should be growing with the cost of gas (AGAIN) being so high. Not shrinking and being less and less useful. Maybe it is time to shut the whole effing thing down and rebuild it from the trolley lines and bus ways...out. How about we have a rule that if your a terrible driver, terrible at your job, you get effing fired? You know, LIKE THE REST OF US.


I'm sure one of my 100 readers will disagree with me, but I think union are mostly bullshit these days. They had their place, but in today's world, I don't believe they do any real good. They create bullshit and take your money for their damn dues. Oh, they keep bad employees from getting fired and/or staying that way. Yeah... cause that is a good thing.

It's my blog. I'll bitch if I want to.

Before anyone goes all Pittsburgh on me.... This is my place to rant. So today, I'm ranting about weather.

This has felt like the longest winter EVER. I'm sick of the cold. Of heavy winter coats. Of sweaters. I don't give a shit if this is normal for Pittsburgh in March. As far as I am concerned... As soon as the first day of spring hit, all snow and frost became forbidden.

Maybe its the two winters of terrifying, epically long commutes, shoveling shit loads snow, bitter cold temperatures early and relentless in their staying power, the mother effing stink bugs that some how still appear or that liar groundhog.

What ever it is... I'm sick of winter.
Yeah, I could move. But I probably never will despite an urge to do so this winter more than any other. Why? Well, despite its flaws, I love Pittsburgh very much. It's not Pittsburgh's fault that it's located in weather bullshit central of Pa. I would point out all the weather and earth bullshit that doesn't happen here, except I don't want to jinx us. Also, my family and friends.... They would ALL have to move with me. That's not happening. They love Pittsburgh too. You're stuck with me.

So, I will bitch and moan about winter. But as I did last year, I will make you a promise.... I will not utter a word of complaint about 90 and holy hawt. Cause I can always go swimming. You didn't hear a peep last year either. Go look. Look at my archives, look at my 17,000+ tweets. (OMG, do I ever shut up???) There are no complaints. Not one.

Bring it on already. Also, someone needs to do something about that lying effing groundhog. Srsly.

My next post will be called "suck it, penndot." I'll write it tomorrow as I sit in epic bullshit traffic on northbound 279/79 as I desperately try to get to Cranberry in less than an hour and half.
Bastards.

Black Friday Idiots

I never ever shop on Black Friday. There is always a riot at a walmart over electronics. The traffic is insane.. At $3.09 a gallon my ass is sitting in the chair, shopping at Amazon. Srsly.
Finally... The people are NUTS.
Per the PG:
Shoppers head to the stores early

The first shopper at the North Hills Village Mall Best Buy appeared at noon Thursday for the can-you-believe-it deals that have become as expected this time of year as turkey. At least 300 people had joined nearly four hours later.
Nearby, a crowd of at least 600 people stood outside the North Hills Village Target.

REALLY??? WTF is wrong with people. Don't you spend 1 damn day with your family?? Huh? 1!!

Shoppers pitched tents to brave the rain or stood near store-supplied propane heaters to stay warm in the early hours this morning

You know what I call that? Fuckin.... Nuts.

Its cold. Raining. IT'S THANKSGIVING. Stay Home.

 

And in the "I can't make this shit up!" Column:

 

USA Today: "Facebook jealousy sparks asthma attacks in dumped boy"

 

Before I go ANY farther.... WHY THE HELL IS THIS NEWS?????

Are you EFFING kidding me? My brain actually hurts from reading JUST the headline. SRSLY.

Whats next? 

"Pirates Players discover other teams win with low payroll and drink themselves in to comas"?

"OchoCinco realizes he will never see a Superbowl ring and end-zone dances himself in to traffic"?

"Anger over repeated threats for bus service cuts sparks Riders to beat management senseless"

 Oh wait... that last one could happen.... Heh.

I can't even quote the article. The whole story is completely absurd. It makes me so mad I want to spork the AP for even publishing this story ANYWHERE.

Strange (and scary) Sightings.... Random Edition

Resurrecting the Strange Sighting tag on the blog tonight... woo!!! lol 
I have a few things to show you tonight.... The first up::

Hideous Dress Courtesy Of Scarehouse Scott (pictured with said dress) He is the Creative Director of Scarehouse... and I would love to know where he found this....

Scott and the freaky bunny next to him enjoyed tormenting Burghbaby with that dress Ryan Secrest Style. Even though she eventually put it on. (Your welcome for me not posting the pic with you **in** the dress standing next to him. I have a few of those.... but they are too scary to post here lol...)

The dress?? **shudder**

From reader Beth:

I don't want to ask. I really can't imagine how desperate you are to work to BE IN this musical. Do you think the company who made this sign for the bus giggled the whole time??? Do you think the drivers were all: "I'm not driving the Menopause bus!! You drive it." Is there a union rule that says you don't have to drive the Menopause bus if you worked at PAT for at least 10 years???

Also from Beth:

As you see.... Proof that sometimes... the smart kids have WAY WAY too much time on their hands.... And no girlfriend....

And Finally.. All I'm gonna say is that they were doing their hairz out there the other night with hair dryers and curling irons.

Yes. Its a floor lamp. Yes, there are car cleaning products on the porch wall.... Yes, they started painting and then stopped. No. I am definitely  NOT gonna ask.

Thing that piss me off: Bug Edition

Let the word out.
If you are a bug, your ass is dead if you come near me. Especially if your a f&%$ing stink bug.
I am the bug assassin. If your a bug? "I keel you!!" (jeff dunham ref)

I have been ignoring the little bastards for like a week. I hate them. They are the creepiest f&%$ing bug I have ever seen. Last year I was stalked by one in my house. There was about 3 hanging out in my room at moms... We kept our distance. But they freak me out.
Well I noticed 4 in the bedroom at my house.
I noticed them because when I sent julia in there on a time out from teasing the dog, she laid in the bed, crying that were "scary bugs everywhere." I made her serve her time out on the chair in the living room. I never got to deal with them because the flash storm rolled in and knocked out power to half of the south hills area for like 12 hours.

Today, when I walked into that bedroom to close the open window because the air was on, I was STUNNED. I counted 13.
Oh. Hell. No.

This shit was ON now! I whipped out the vacuum, put the attachments on the hose and let out a battle cry. Well... I cursed at them a lot. As I sucked them up, I started enjoying the satisfying little "thwak" they made. Hehehe DIE bitches DIE.....

Anyway. That open window had a gap in the screen. When I pulled the mini blind up there was a f&%$ing parade of the effers heading to that gap in the screen. I think I muttered the words "I dont think so assholes." as I wacked the screen. And there was WAY more than 13 in the Bissel at this point. I stopped counting at 25 dead. I sucked every single one up. Behind the dresser (its in front of the window), the walls, the window sill... Then I covered the end of the hose to be sure they were all suffering a horrible suffocating death for terrorizing my kid. ( and me at night when I'm trying to sleep) I closed the window real tight and stalked the last couple that escaped the bedroom. I ran the sweeper on the carpet to add to their misery if any were still living.

I went to moms, and repeated the same process in my room... Discovering there was like 8 or so more. I am pretty sure by then I was shouting shit like "I am the assassin!" "F&%$ you bug." "DIE" "You can run but I will get you!!!" "Who is the bad ass bitch with the bissel??!!" "Let me hear your little screams!!"
Maybe.
I ran the sweeper on the carpet on 2 floors to ensure their miserable deaths. And I flushed one tonight that had snuck in to my bathroom to hide. I enjoyed the drowning. Bastards.

I killed almost 40 of those f&%$ers today. The catch? I have the same model bag-less bissel at both houses. And the containers will need emptied at some point....
Bastards.