Love This Church!

I think the church is on to me. I think they are following the blog.... Look at the Message this week:

Oh but I do! I totally mock *everything* when possible. I am a non conformist at heart. I don't fell right unless I am mocking something! It will surely send me to hell, but oh well. So, is this a case of the church watching me? Hmmm? Am I paranoid now too?

Is this referring to Jesus, God, the church or a combination of all of the above? If there is a Master... I will mock them. I promise! :-)

.

Love This Church!

So, the title for this weeks sermon:

This inspired me to ask:

Ok... So, someone tell me, when is it? When does Jesus get pms and be all like "F you! I don't care!" I might have to attend this to find out. This seems like it would be really important information to have, right? I don't want to bother Jesus when he is in a don't care kind of mood, ya know. I don't want to be praying for something and its when he is in a bitchy ass moment and saw, "You know what, "I don't care if your in a burning house and your praying to get out"

And really... Is it like "No, I don't care about you praying for those stupid prada shoes" or is it "damn it, I am tired of you praying about everything under the sun! I don't CARE!"

Do you think he is like "oh Angie? No, i don't care if she makes fun of a church." (she is going to hell anyway)
I really want to know. Thoughts anyone?

Love this Church!

To ensure I am going right to hell, here is a new edition of Love this Church!

Ok, your task is to use the words "strong" and "banana" in a phrase. Go!




You got me on this one.
I have no idea what the hell that means. I interpret this as "shut the f&%$ up about the rotten food."
Is this opposed to weak silence and fresh bananas?
I don't get it. And apparently I am too tired to come up with something witty to say about it.

Love this Church

So the church hasn't been interesting enough for me to take pics. And while I really can't make a lot of fun of this... its still amusing. ( I needed to refresh my going straight to hell status)

Is it too late in the day to do what? I feel like I am missing and important part of the conversation here? Any suggestions from my wonderful group of readers??

Love This Church: Special Edition

So, I finally put these up... I have 3 today. That is why it is a Special Edition. :-)
And pretend you didn't notice the time I posted this.




I have a better suggestion. Put in a Doorbell. Maybe Opportunity is lazy, or you left the screen door locked. What about those of us who are not skilled enough to build a door? Can I go to Lowe's and buy one? :-)



Food? What kind of food? Cause if I am coming there on my lunch break, you better have some food cause I'll be hungry! Can we talk about cake? I love cake. Particularly... Spice cake with cream cheese icing. :-)


And I saved the Best for last: Submitted by Jamie-Lynn.



"It says "Weeds are flowers too, once you get to know them" - Eeyore! An Eeyore quote!!! Loved it. So I figured I'd pass it along!(:~~Jamie-Lynn~~:)"


Jamie-Lynn... I agree. Its hilarious that they quoted a Winnie the Pooh character! I love it!

Love This Church: WTF Edition

For Record:
I know the picture is crappy... It was dark (after work) when I took it, and I didn't have the time to stand very still to use the night mode on my phone's camera

All I have to say... This stopped me in my tracks.

The $10,000 word this week is: Skydiving.

Go!!




Wtf? What does this mean? If you fail at skydiving your DEAD! That is an Epic fail!!
Or is this more of a "If your generally a screw up don't take up skydiving"? Sometimes I wonder... This is as good as my "don't wish to be anything but what your are" post.


Gotta love the church... endless amusement!!

Love This Church: Double header Edition

Welcome to this double header of Love This Church!! I haven't cemented my place is hell for a couple weeks so here is 2 weeks of Love This Church for ya!!!

Up first....



Apparently the Beasts are very gossipy creatures. They don't intend to do anything but blab your business to everyone! I just don't know what to make of this... Is it a warning? A reminder? A hint? What??? Is it "tell all" as in all your business or "tell all" as in all the people with in earshot? and if its the second one... What are they telling? Secrets to real estate (scams) Riches??


And second.... How to write an incomplete phrase or sentence:



Ok.... is "OF" really needed here? And what do stone mangers have to do with census taking? Is this secret code for "Make sure one of the friendly beasts don't run off with baby Jesus?" Does the Census keep track of mangers and/or their contents now? I never saw that on my census questionnaire.... "How many mangers are in this household?" Nope... not there. What is the Census tracking here???

Give me my bus ticket to hell now.

Love this Church!!

I was so excited when I saw the sign today :-)

OK, so... Know the no??? Is "No" an entity now? Is this like "Know the man?" or is "no" a thing? As in "Know the Trolley?" I want to know what "Know the No" means!!

Love this church!

Love this church....

There will be a couple more church pics. Hopefully, I can get them friday morning before they change the signs. Its too dark when I leave work to get good pics... Now, onward with the silliness:


Do not aspire, do not dream. Dont bother.... HA!!

This, to me, is hilarious.

Anyone want to get uh dirty? Hehehe...

After plugging my phone into my pc and copying the pic right from it, I have now uploaded my church post from monday.


Need I say anything? I wish I could hear this sermon! Oh I can think of some things that fit this.

Cause my mind is naughty like that! Yes it is. :-) I will certainly feel 'healed' afterwards too. Who wouldn't?!

Then of course there is the innocent kind- this involves playing with children at their level- in the water, dirt, mud, chalk, crayons, sea of toys or finger paints (in burgbaby's case). This can be healing an dirty too.

But lets be clear- I was thinking adult fun first :-) I love this church.

Word Challenge!

The $10 word of the week is counterfeit! Your challenge is to use it in a phrase that doesn't involve money! Go!

One Word!

Hmmm... I guess the $10 word was too hard this week!

Why i love this church.

Nothing sums it up better what it feels like to take customer service calls during a full moon. After being stuck on a call for over an hour- 45 minutes past the end of my day, causing me to miss 2 possible buses- repeating instructions that are being ignored, this is exactly what i feel. Lucky for me, bus number 3 was late.

The worst people to talk to are the ones who *think* they know what they are doing- but actually are SO dumb you wonder how they remember to breathe. And to top it off- i have to work tomorrow. I need a drink!

Classic "love this church" moment

This is a classic "love this church" pic. It was the first one I took and it has gone on to inspire me to blog...

"So tell me.... Was Circumference the $10.00 word of the week??? A horizon is straight. A Circumference is round.... hmmm"

Odd Words bonus round

''For the $25000 bonus round- use the words "cactus" and "taco" in a 4 word phrase.''

Wont eating a cactus taco hurt?
Why would that be from heaven? I love this church. They are hilarious!!!

Church Thoughts of the week

I love the Smithfield street Church, I walk past it everyday. I swear someone there has a sense of humor. This was a recent "Thought of the week" as I call them.

An I said to God, "Well um, actually, the officer called it indecent exposure..." haaaa!

I know.... I am going to hell. But its still funny.