Monday, December 7, 2009

A Little Christmas Bitching

I want to say I love Christmas. Not the cold and snow shit so much, but the lights and gift giving shit? I love. I love finding that perfect gift for someone, whether I am shopping on amazon.com (love ya) or my other favoritest store, Target (Yes, I know favoritest is not a word. It's my blog. I can say what I want.) I love sneaking out at 9pm and shopping during the extended hours cause I can get always get a close spot in the lot. I love hearing Julia in the back seat talking about how all the "pretty lights are wonderful, Mommy!!" It makes me happy.

But it seems that there is always one damn person who has to suck the FUN out of Christmas for me every year. This year it is Family Member A. (aka FMA) FMA buys themselves EVERYTHING. They have apparently never heard of the November Rule. (This rule states that as of Nov 1, you don't make any purchases for yourself without approval so that people can buy you stuff for the holidays) It seems simple enough right? WAIT a few weeks for non urgent items and someone ELSE will BUY it for YOU. Right????

FMA has this horrible habit of breaking the rule, EVERY YEAR. Going so far as to BUY the present themselves (!!) to make sure they would get it one year. After getting a reasonable idea for FMA who has EVERYTHING... We find out FMA went and bought the item Thursday night (!!!) and we were going shopping on Friday! December 3rd. FMA is buying themselves stuff December f&%$ing 3rd!!!

Dear FMA: STOP IT.

I was so pissed that FMA almost did not get a damn present this year.

Then you have the family members who wont give you ideas for themselves (or their kids) and you have to just guess what they might like or don't have already. FUN. It's especially helpful for those people you don't see and talk to on like a weekly basis. Makes you want to spork someone.

Almost as bad, are the ideas so vague that the person might as well have grunted at you.

"Sweaters." OK. What kind? What colors? What style? Personally, I detest turtle neck sweaters. DETEST. Unless you ask me, I don't run around professing my hate for clothing wrapped around my neck. I never ask for clothes. Cause I know I am picky. Hella picky.

"Perfume." Again... What brand? What kind of scent? Full strength? Watered down? Again, I am the kind of person who's body chemistry can destroy the scent of perfume the second it hits my skin. So, I have 2 maybe 3 scents I know I can wear and not smell hideous.

My absolute favorites are the lists that read like its from a rich kid in Fox Chapel:

What I want for Christmas:

A Treadmill.....


WHAT? A treadmill? Where the f*&% are you putting a $4000 piece of equipment? Who do you think is buying you THAT? SRSLY?

To end on a nicer note:
So, when I went shopping Friday I very annoyed and I was trying to live up to the "Bitch Train" Status on Blackberry Messenger. I was going to take all those people that pissed me off and just get some random gift cards and be done with it. Why put effort in to it when they are not making an effort? Gift cards are wonderful, I ask for them alot. But at least I ASKED for specific kinds of gift cards.

It was a nice, but exhausting day. Daytime shopping at the Mt Nebo/Camp Horne Rd Target rocked. The place wasn't hideously crowded, we found some very good deals and I got a ton of shopping done for almost the whole 20+ person list. The side note, is that I really wanted people to have something to open this year. Turns out, I changed my mind and bought them stuff, going out on a bit of a limb and I have to hope they like what I got them.

Bitch Train or not, I couldn't stay in that mood. I had fun picking out toys for the little ones on the list, including Julia. Christmas shopping CAN be fun. As long as you aren't going to the G20 Summit (aka Walmart on Black Friday) to do it.

:-)

PS I'm trying to post more. I promise.

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